Since late 2015 I have been a member of the Warhammer 40,000 community on Gmod, starting with Knights of Grey Gaming (KoGG), Axiom, ASG, Hammerfall, and Limitless gaming. In those years I have made friends, acquaintances, and people who generally did not agree with me on some things but tolerated my presence.

I have done what most members of the community could wish for. Climbing the ranks of a private in the imperial guard, serving as a member of the mighty space marines, and even be promoted through the ranks of the Inquisition and achieve the rank of Lord Inquisitor and inspire duty and courage to my subordinates. Some people thought that I got the rank for being someone's friend or purring my way up the ranks, but that is not the case. I claimed through the ranks tooth and nail, taking orders and following them despite my feelings about it. And I guess you could say it did work, and to most people when they saw me they were inspired to do just as good if not better.

However as the days turned to weeks and then to months, people started to forget what the community was about. All they cared about was their small little friend groups and getting themselves to high positions by any means necessary so they could be the ones to boss people around. Staff that I trusted became corrupt and hostile to any objection to what they said, so i did what I thought was right and became a member of staff myself (Axiom-Early Hammerfall). I did everything by the book and did what I could to make sure people had fun and respected one each other, but as those days when on even I could not stop the corruption around me. I lost my faith in the people that I called friends and fellow staff, and when you watch as people you know get fired from staff or even banned from the server, it hurts allot.

And so I left the community, taking a very long break from Gmod as a hole. My heart not bearing the stress of hearing people that once trusted each other to fall apart and turn into bitter enemies and hate one another...Well I’m tired of hating. So in my eyes those who I felt had wronged my either personally or by my friends I am going to do what so many people refuse to do through grudges or just pure hatred for each other. I forgive and am sorry, I wish I could fix every situation that has happened and allowed people to bury the hatchet under the cherry tree and get back to days where we were not enemies.

So I hope that one day I may return to the battlefields of old and see a few old friends still fighting the good fight. And if you ever hear about old Thomas Gerna, then they probably are talking about me.