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24 of 40 (60%) achievements earned:
Personal Achievements
 

Yankmaster

You’ve always loved to yank the ol’ handle! Awarded for hitting a jackpot on any slot machine.
Unlocked 7 Oct, 2014 @ 11:30am

Safe Citizen

It’s the next best thing to having yourself spayed or neutered! Awarded for wearing a lubber before having sex with the Hooker.
Unlocked 7 Oct, 2014 @ 1:39pm

Pretty (Gross) Woman

You’ve passed a milestone; be sure to tell all your friends. Awarded for having sex with the hooker while wearing a lubber.
Unlocked 7 Oct, 2014 @ 1:39pm

You Love This Game!

Hmm. This looks just different enough to avoid a lawsuit! Awarded for getting a good look up close at the Angry Broads arcade cabinet.
Unlocked 28 Aug, 2014 @ 11:40am

Order of the White Pants

Congratulations! You finished the game without once getting peed on by the dog! See? Staying a moving target is not just important in FPS’s.
Unlocked 8 Oct, 2014 @ 2:56am

Cable Svengali

Have you considered a career as a programming executive? Awarded for hypnotizing the Pimp with the television.
Unlocked 7 Oct, 2014 @ 1:29pm

Tool Grabber

You’re taking “dumpster diving” quite literally, Larry! Awarded for retrieving the hammer by falling from the fire escape into the dumpster.
Unlocked 7 Oct, 2014 @ 2:35pm

That’ll Do, Pig

You’re ahead of the game when you can tell the slop from the glop! Awarded for earning the hot sauce by finding all hidden objects at the Buffet.
Unlocked 8 Oct, 2014 @ 1:52am

Enabler of the Year

Real nice. And the ulterior motive just makes it worse. Awarded for giving a box of wine to the bum and receiving the pocket knife.
Unlocked 7 Oct, 2014 @ 1:13pm

Lubber Band

Well, well. That wasn’t the least bit embarrassing! Awarded for buying a condom at the Come ‘n’ Go store.
Unlocked 7 Oct, 2014 @ 1:34pm

Not With My Whale, You Don’t!

Nice going, Ahab! Now we have to say “Some cartoon animals were injured in the making of this game.” Awarded for pouring the hot sauce into the whale’s blowhole.
Unlocked 8 Oct, 2014 @ 2:19am

Making Friends Everywhere You Go

You have such a gentle touch with that discarded syringe. Awarded for extracting the civet from the cat.
Unlocked 8 Oct, 2014 @ 2:34am

Frontier Pharmacist

At least you had the good sense to only make one bottle! Complete the creation of eau d’ Larry.
Unlocked 8 Oct, 2014 @ 2:37am

Unexpected Disco Stud

Who knew? She seemed so sweet. Awarded for dancing with Fawn at Studio 69.
Unlocked 7 Oct, 2014 @ 1:36pm

We Would’ve Brought a Gift

But it was all so fast! That was the shortest engagement on record! Awarded for marrying Fawn at the Weddin’ Ready chapel.
Unlocked 7 Oct, 2014 @ 1:53pm

Law and Order: Lost Wages

Congratulations, brave adventurer! You have graduated to full-scale breaking and entering! Get the pills from Lefty's window.
Unlocked 7 Oct, 2014 @ 2:41pm

Law and Order: Lost Wages II

This is your second major act of criminal trespass! Way to go! Awarded for entering Adam's penthouse.
Unlocked 7 Oct, 2014 @ 2:45pm

Handy to Have Around the House

You can fix anything! What woman wouldn’t love a guy like you? (Answer: All of them!) Awarded for patching up the love doll.
Unlocked 8 Oct, 2014 @ 2:50am

Defying Physics

Don’t try this at home. It requires a dramatic license! Awarded for using the patched love doll to float across the chasm.
Unlocked 8 Oct, 2014 @ 2:51am

Oh. My. God.

You did it. You not only got laid, but you’ve found true love. (Maybe.) Awarded for giving the apple to Eve.
Unlocked 8 Oct, 2014 @ 2:56am

Busted!

You big show-off! Correction: You show-off! Awarded for wearing the lubber outdoors.
Unlocked 7 Oct, 2014 @ 1:41pm

Swirlie Swan Song

What did the last guy eat, rubber cement?! Awarded for flushing the toilet in Lefty's bathroom.
Unlocked 5 Oct, 2014 @ 8:55am

Mugger Mayhem

You always did consider yourself a lover and not a fighter. Awarded for getting beaten up by the mugger.
Unlocked 28 Aug, 2014 @ 11:34am

Road Rash

“Somebody get the scraper!” Awarded for getting run down by a speeding vehicle.
Unlocked 28 Aug, 2014 @ 11:46am



+16

16 hidden achievements remaining

Details for each achievement will be revealed once unlocked