FerriBerri AKA furry lover

hehe nice name

I asked mom why i should never open that closet and so i opened it and a giant black eel came slithering out of the crack and it strangled me with its giant black slimy muscles. before i could fight it off a large african american man entered the room and screamed "hey thats my ♥♥♥♥" whoooops if i could give birth to a thousand spiders and have them all crawl out of my ass and thats the best super power anybody could have like seriously try robbing a bank while i shoot spiders out of my ass i shot a dog on the way to work

10:02 AM - rac Tomm: and i got to walk about in one of those frocks with no back
10:02 AM - rac Tomm: was ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ fresh

>ask cute girl from class if she wants to see a movie with me
>she says yes
>"cool, pick me up at 8?"
>give her a fist bump
>run home
>she arrives at 7:45, her dad is driving
>no one says a word the whole way there
>as we're getting out of the car in front of the theater I hold my hand out to her dad
>he just stairs at me
>politely inform him movies don't grow on trees
>he hands me a $20
>"I guess we aren't eating then?"
>he looks furious, his daughter looks like she's about to cry
>he gives me another $10
>roll my eyes and say "Yeah, thanks guy" sarcastically
>we get to the ticket window
>"One for Drive, please and thank you"
>I can see the tears forming in cute girl's eyes now
>"Did your dad not give you any money?"
>"Damn bro, tough break..."
>give her a fist bump
>we didn't go on a second date

happy bday feshar

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CzizzvEhhaQ&list=UUPa510XQEFSEGhJj_8lMuZw