@cringeatron Dale cooper is captive, held in chains, confined within the purely theoretical, and figurative state of being a fictional character. He can only drink figurative coffee comprised of thought and no real matter. I, on the other hand, am able to drink real tangible coffee, therefore if it was a competition on literally drinking coffee, I would win. However, I hold the key to unlock agent coopers hypothetically literal prison of intangibility, and in the case he was real, he would win because too much coffee makes my anxiety worse and he clearly just… really really cares about coffee. To a freaky extent

Who would win in a coffee drinking contest: You or Dale Cooper?

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

AHAHAHHA I'm sorry I don't know how to change it... I didn't even know nicknames were a thing on steam

HOW DO I REMOVE USER NICKNAMES I SET YOUR ONE TO HUMAN 10000 YEARS AGO AND I NOW CRINGE EVERYTIME I SEE IT GAHHHHHHGFHGFHDRSGSWRDGTFWS

AAGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH