What the darn-diddily-doodily did you just say about me, you little witcharooney? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class at Springfield Bible College, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret mission trips in Capital City, and I have over 300 confirmed baptisms. I am trained in the Old Testament and I’m the top converter in the entire church mission group. You are nothing to me but just another heathen. I will cast your sins out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before in Heaven, mark my diddily-iddilly words. You think you can get away with saying that blasphemy to me over the Internet? Think again, friendarino. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of evangelists across Springfield and your IP is being traced by God right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggorino. The storm that wipes out the diddily little thing you call your life of sin. You’re going to Church, kiddily-widdily.

You’re so ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ pathetic. You accidentally took one rip of it. Are you just like…not into concentration? What is the problem exactly?

Awwww! Did someone strap a gas mask onto your ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ face and pump it full of vaporized meth? Here let me get you a tissue. SIKE! It’s more ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ meth. Eat an 8-ball right now. Hotrail 3 yards of it! Lock yourself in your car while I pump it full of meth. Do not think about breathing oxygen.

♥♥♥♥ you, you ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ pansies. Meth is awesome. You’re the problem. It’s okay though.

…i know you can’t quit being a ♥♥♥♥♥.

I don’t care if your mom smoked meth while she was pregnant with you and that’s why you were born addicted and given a pipe instead of a bottle! I don’t care if the cartel wiped out your family to get that crystal from point A to point ME!

QUIT BEING A ♥♥♥♥♥…

Blow clouds or blow me.

Hey girl! I heard your boyfriend might be doing meth. Guess what? I HOPE HE IS. THAT WOULD MEAN AT LEAST ONE OF YOU IS COOL. I think you’re right. He’s using meth for sure. He was playing what? Video games? You said 3 in the morning? Oh yeah. He’s a tweaker now. Nothing you can do but join in and QUIT BEING A ♥♥♥♥♥!

I don’t care if you accidentally did meth. You’re on it now ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥. Strap in and be thankful you didn’t snort coke the CIA laced with fentanyl to kill you. get over it. QUIT BEING A ♥♥♥♥♥!

“My heart is pounding! My head hurts! Did I take too much?” Shut the ♥♥♥♥ up you absolute ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ baby. I am so sorry someone gave you a real drug and you just can’t handle the what? The ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ clarity it gives you? QUIT BEING A ♥♥♥♥♥!

Are you kidding me, you ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥? A cookie? You think I'm some kind of a ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ sugar-craving weakling? Do I look like the kind of piece of ♥♥♥♥ who would be satisfied with a measly cookie? I ain't no ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ kid, you know. I'm a grown-ass adult, and I want something with a little more ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ substance. Maybe a big, juicy steak or a ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ pint of beer, not some ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ cookie. So don't offer me no cookie, you prick, unless you want me to shove it up your ass.