ITS DA AMERIKA BOY

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I huffed propane

Revan was only 22 years old.
He loved CS:GO so much.
He had most of the achievments and items.
He prayed to Gaben every night before bed, thanking him for the inventory he’s been given.
“CS:GO is love.” He says, “CS:GO is life.”
His dad hears him and calls him a silver scrublord.
He knows his dad is just jealous of his son’s devotion to Gabe.
He calls him a console peasant.
He slaps him and sends him to sleep.
He’s crying now and his face hurts.
He lays in bed, and it’s really cold.
He feels a warmth moving towards him.
He looks up.
It’s Gabe!

He’s so happy.
Gabe whispers into Revan’s ear. “Try your chances… Open a case.”
Gaben grabs Revann with his powerful dev-team hands and puts him on his hands and knees.
He’s ready.
Revan opens his pockets for Gabe.
Gabe puts his hands deep into Revan’s pockets.
It costs so much, but Revan does it for CS:GO.
Revan can feel his wallet emptying as his eyes start to water.
He accepts the terms and conditions.
Revan wants to please Gabe.
Gaben lets out a mighty roar as he fills Revans computer with keys.
Revan opens all the cases and get nothing worth anything at all
CS:GO is love…
CS:GO is life….