1 person found this review helpful
Not Recommended
0.0 hrs last two weeks / 1,077.5 hrs on record (108.6 hrs at review time)
Posted: 16 May, 2021 @ 10:30am
Updated: 14 Dec, 2021 @ 11:37am

Here at Gaijin we work our best to make you either look like a giant bundle of sticks or a mentally deficient sexually promiscious prostitute. There will be always that J2M pilot hovering over your base that will pick your aircrafts one by one, the one that even after several boom and zoom attempts by the player, manages to strike him in the bottom and make him waste valuable time, resources and effort. Nothing will feel as orgasmically pleasuring than taking down these flying clowns. Bruce, from the official WarThunder™️ Youtube channel will teach you techniques and ways to play the game that you will either not use, are impossible to execute, thus making them useless and because lacking a flying etiquette is not as bad as having one that nobody abides to. Be ready to spawn in an arieal traffic jam, hope that either you don't hit your fellows while moving into the battlements, or pray that some with ♥♥♥♥♥ for brains doesn't crash onto you and- WHY THE ♥♥♥♥ ARE YOU SHOOTING AT ME, YOU STUPID F**KING BUNDLE OF STICKS, WE ARE ON THE SAME TEAM. If you managed to not get ♥♥♥♥♥♥ there, wait till you meet other issues far ahead, especially if you are a bomber. There is absolutely no such thing as "teamwork" forget about that sh*t for suckers, what you will have instead is occasional swarms of allied flying scraps of metal that will concentrate onto a particular place of the map onto a single enemy while ignoring everything else, this will be the reason as to why you will: have no support as a bomber (any bomber, strategic, tactical, frontline, dive, jet and so on), the best way to play with a bomber in this game is to get as close to the stratosphere as possible to the point where you wonder how exactly your crew members aren't either suffocating or freezing their ass off inside of your flying pignatta, a pignatta it is, because fighters of the enemy team will absolutely try to take roles as interceptors, and yes, their climbing speed is probably better than yours since they are lighter most of the time. This is the point where you realize that you'd rather play any other game rather than to rather live like this. The game will honestly put things in your life in perspective: "I could've used the time I spent and will spend on this game and its toxic player base onto better activities, and even better games" but thanks to their very ingenious battle pass system, and daily rewards you wouldn't feel so compelled to break this devil's circle. Tearing your foreskin with your finger nails is much more exciting than knowing that you'll fly around a little before you get shot down by a person you didn't see appear in your interface who manages just right to strafe you and knock out your pilot. Researching a airplane? Well, win battles to gain research points. Alright, seems fair, a good way to grind. Finished researching? OK now we have to pay for the researched aircraft, fair enough. Changing pilot? Under the excuse of "conversion training" as if your pilots were a summer camp of sexual minorities, you will usually pay a sixth of what the airplane you researched and paid for, this will become more of a problem as your BR climbs. These hoops, every time and the last step will be repeated every time you want to change aircrafts, even of those of lower Battle Rating, even if you paid that rip-off sum of Silver Lion credits to promote your crew to expert grade for that specific aircraft. Do not, absolutely DO NOT, waste or buy Golden Eagles (premium in-game tokens) in order to get weird looking and rare aircrafts, they will be fully maxed-out by default and the fun of grinding for improved parts is fully removed, also, I've shot down many premium aircraft, if that shouldn't be enough advice for even the most unique of the special needs kids. If you have money to throw away that's a totally different story, because I still hate you for being a decadent and degenerate petit bourgeois who encourages this market ♥♥♥♥, which brings me to the next point: the marketplace. Although I previously mentioned that the Battle Pass is designed in a way to make you stick around and complete certain tasks, what I didn't tell is that you can get rewards for a certain time window and that without a proper Battle Pass that you can pay for only 2500 Golden Eagles (16,50€ last time I checked) you only have access to half of the rewards in it. This means you will be doing half of the work just to get NOTHING in return, and you also better hurry, because if you don't, a valuable and actually worth it reward is going to slip from your hands, because the BP transitions to the next season. Nothing brings more joy than seeing that you could've potentially get 100.000 Silver Lions but then, the following day you see that you are to the starting line and that the rewards have changed. But I digress, the marketplace is what I wanted to talk. As if things weren't convoluted enough as far as it goes with currency, you do not only have Silver Lions and Golden Eagles, nope, you also have these "Warbonds" to which you can have only a limited supply of and this forces you to spend them on the market, you will most likely spend them on a few boosters and a pack of universal back ups for your vehicles and can only be obtained thorugh the Battle Pass or by (of course) buying them with Golden Eagles. Then there is the Gaijin Coin, this can't only be used in War Thunder, but also any other Gaijin game (Crossout, Enlisted etc.) not only this adds an extra loop, this ♥♥♥♥ is also extra-premium, the average cost of a premium veichle is less than 10€, at higher tiers it rarely crosses 16€, but with the Gaijin market, the average costs climbs up to 50€ for most "packs" I am putting it in brackets, because these packs come under the false guise that there are multiple veichles in them, no, what you get most of the time is one vehicle (which is often if not always, a variant of an already existing one) and decals for it.

I orginally drafted this review onto my notes, let's say that the original one was uh, more "heavy worded" if you know what I mean. In conclusion: Do not actually put much genuine effort into this game.

And yes, I am absolutely contradicting myself with that last sentence. I hate myself.

UPDATE 2021.12.14: This Israeli tech tree should've been delayed when it was actually ready to be made. What kind of message is Gaijin sending by leaving us a nation with only a couple of premium aircrafts available??? Nobody asked for this, nobody asked for Israel.
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