“Is that ham processed? If it's processed, I don't
want it"

Ma'am, that is an eleven pound whole slab of
deli ham. It has no bones, fat, or connective
tissue. It is an amalgamation of the meat of
several pigs, emulsified, liquefied, strained, and
ultimately inexorably joined in an unholy meat
obelisk. God had no hand in the creation of this
abhorrence. The fact that this ham monolith
exists proves that God is either impotent to alter
His universe or ignorant to the horrors taking
place in his kingdom. This prism of pork is more
than deli meat. It is a physical
declaration of mankind's
contempt for the natural
order. Itis hubris manifest