I'm going to try and summarize three different games instead of reviewing them all separately:

---{ Graphics }---
☐ You forget what reality is
☐ Beautiful
☐ Good
☑ Decent (ME2 & 3)
☑ Bad (ME1)
☐ Don‘t look too long at it
☐ MS-DOS

The games were released from 2007 to 2012 so I can't knock them too hard for not looking good. ME 2 & 3 are each a noticeable step up from their predecessors in graphics quality but have aliasing problems

---{ Gameplay }---
☑ Very good (ME3)
☑ Good (ME2)
☐ It's just gameplay
☑ Mehh (ME1)
☐ Watch paint dry instead
☐ Just don't

Mass effect 1 had the least engaging combat and felt dated. Constantly hoarding guns, armor and equipment you don't need only to sell them off to merchants reminded me of Borderlands but here the min-maxing is even worse since you also have to min-max 6 other characters. I quickly got tired of shuffling everyone's equipment around and began taking Ashley and Liara on every mission. Also the game has way too many copy-pasted environments.

Mass Effect 2 was a step up in terms of fun but they over-nerfed abilities to the extent that many of them are almost totally useless. I played through the entire series as an Infiltrator on hardcore difficulty and quickly moved points away from AI-hacking then never used it again once I realized how weak it was. It was so weak in fact that I thought it wasn't working at all at first since machines go back to attacking you almost as soon as you hack them. Also the Infiltrators cloak is laughably overpowered since enemies forget you exist the moment you turn it on giving you an easy "Oh ♥♥♥♥" button for any situation. If your teammates are both dead, enemies will just stand there staring stupidly into space while your cloak is active which is funny but somewhat immersion breaking. Lastly The removal of almost all of the RPG skill mechanics was disappointing to me and a lot of skill points went unused because again, many abilities are useless.

Mass effect 3 is the most fun of the trilogy but just marginally as ME2 was already such a blast to begin with. All of my previous comments about me2 have been addressed, powers are now much more impactful. AI hacking is good, really good. The Cerberus Engineer quickly became my favorite enemy since their turrets are OP when in the players hands and can clear whole rooms in seconds while I do nothing and watch. Tactical cloak is less impactful but still a strong class ability; enemies have a limited ability to see you at close range and will continue shooting at the location they last saw you instead of just forgetting you exist. Most of the RPG mechanics are still gone but they've added more to the skill trees to make them more interesting


---{ Audio }---
☐ Eargasm
☐ Very good
☐ Good
☑ Not too bad
☐ Bad
☐ I'm now deaf

The audio and soundtrack didn't stand out to me in any significant way. The only critique I can think of is that Male Shepherds voice acting is subpar.

---{ Audience }---
☐ Kids
☑ Teens
☑ Adults
☐ Grandma

Maybe not appropriate for young kids but pre-teens can probably play it. The most sexually explicit stuff I saw was Liaras bare ass and women in underwear which is not a big deal for the average person older than 10 unless you're that big a prude. And violence? Pfft, I was playing Gears of War when I was in middle school, the occasional exploding head or severed limb is nothing.

---{ PC Requirements }---
☐ Check if you can run paint
☑ Potato (ME 1)
☑ Decent (ME 2 &3)
☐ Fast
☐ Rich boi
☐ Ask NASA if they have a spare computer

If you've got a 750 Ti or better you should be good,

---{ Game Size }---
☐ Floppy Disk
☐ Old Fashioned
☐ Workable
☐ Big
☑ Will eat 10% of your 1TB hard drive
☐ You will want an entire hard drive to hold it
☐ You will need to invest in a black hole to hold all the data

Literally! it's three games in one so at 100 GB you'll need a good chunk of drive space for this.

---{ Difficulty }---
☐ Just press 'W'
☑ Easy (ME 1)
☐ Easy to learn / Hard to master
☑ Significant brain usage (ME 2 & 3)
☐ Difficult
☐ Dark Souls

This is all for hardcore difficulty:
I thought ME1 was a cakewalk, only dying a few times and was surprised at people saying it could be challenging online at hardcore and higher. Granted I'm accustomed to games like Sekiro punching me in the balls with the force of a freight train for every mistake or even just because but still. The ease in this game comes from the RPG leveling mechanics and armour mods that let you become an unkillable tank regardless of what your class is. Grab the highest tier armour you can, put a few points into HP and grab a few shield modulators and you're set. Money is also extremely easy to come by and you'll have to try to be broke. With the regiments worth of guns and equipment I was bringing home after every other mission to sell I had the max number of credits 2/3s of the way through the game.

Mass Effect 2 and 3 ramp up the difficulty considerably as it is now much more difficult to be a tank thanks to the removal of RPG mechanics and armor mods so you'll never feel like you're immune to gunfire. This also applies to your squadmates not named Grunt who tend to die a lot and contribute a lot less to fights. Enemies are also MUCH more aggressive towards you the player in particular and will gang up on you while ignoring your allies every chance they get. Expect to see every head in the room swivel in your direction and feed you a mouthful of lead every time you pop your head out of cover for more than a second then continue firing when you duck back down to keep you suppressed. Also, on Hardcore and above, Almost every enemy has shields and or armor. Mass effect 3 tones down the AI focus on the player somewhat but compensates by enemies seemingly being smarter.

---{ Grind }---
☑ Nothing to grind
☐ Only if u care about leaderboards/ranks
☐ Isn't necessary to progress
☐ Average grind level
☐ Too much grind
☐ You'll need a second life for grinding

I guess if you reeeeeealy want the best of a given weapon or armor mod in ME1 you can grind for it but I wouldn't bother

---{ Story }---
☐ No Story
☐ Some lore
☐ Average
☐ Good
☐ Lovely
☑ It'll replace your life

The true strong point of the trilogy as a whole is it's exhaustive world building, well written characters and deep, imvolved plot. The ability to import saves from a previous game over to the next and have story characters stay perma-dead or alive to the end of the series is extremely impressive to this day and I still haven't heard of any other game doing anything quite like this since. Bioware could have just had "cannon endings" for each game but went the extra mile. Every character not named Jacob has tons of personality and interesting backstory and you'll quickly become emotionally attached to all of your cremates not named Jacob or Maranda. My favorite sequence of the series was the suicide mission in ME2. That was the most tense and anxious I've been while consuming any kind of media; movie, book, video game etcetera in a long time. I don't think I breathed the entire time.

---{ Game Time }---
☐ Long enough for a cup of coffee
☐ Short
☐ Average
☑ Long
☐ To infinity and beyond

It took me about 115 hours to play through all three games. So yeah pretty long.

---{ Price }---
☐ It's free!
☐ Worth the price
☑ If it's on sale
☐ If u have some spare money left
☐ Not recommended
☐ You could also just burn your money

I never buy any game that isn't on sale as a rule.

---{ Bugs }---
☐ Never heard of
☑ Minor bugs
☐ Can get annoying
☐ ARK: Survival Evolved
☐ The game itself is a big terrarium for bugs

Apart from some graphics bugs and being killed by invisible enemies once or twice there aren't many bugs that I saw.

---{ ? / 10 }---
☐ 1
☐ 2
☐ 3
☐ 4
☐ 5
☐ 6
☐ 7
☐ 8
☑ 9
☐ 10

Must be have an internet connection to play a single player game. ♥♥♥♥ Electronic Arts!

Would love to play the more than I already did but the last time I tried to launch the EA Play piece of s*** would sometimes prevent the game from even launching which results in a hit or miss that I just don't have the patience for.

I don't care for EA Play or their services and it would be nice to have that completely removed as an option to play this great trilogy.