Well, bejasus am I glad you asked that question!

In a nutshell, Valve must add a strange variant or a strangifier for the Tide Turner because it's clearly superior right guys? guys????? Moving on...

The Tide Turner has gone through its weapon balances and changes from crit kills near the end of the charge to its now, mini-crits instead

FOR EXAMPLE, I MEAN JUST LOOK AT SOLARLIGHT'S REPRESENTATION OF HOW FRAGILICIOUS IT IS, JUST LOOK AT THIS!!! sub to him btw cos he's an epic demoknight tf2 gamer

Now let's get to the good stuff yes? Good idea yes?

The Tide Turner was born as a wooden plank that was disjointed from its relatives after a bonfire in a local's back garden, it got lodged into a nearby bush as an unnamed individual miss-predicted his launch of this special piece of wood and therefore landed in the incorrect location.

It lived there for specifically 5014711947 days which can also be converted into the following measurements:

• 4.33271112221e+14 seconds

• 7221185203683.3330078 minutes

• 120353086728.05555725 hours

• 716387421.00033068657 weeks

• 164867061.41699510813 months

• 13738936.841102233157 years

• 1373893.6841102233157 decades

• 137389.36841102232574 centuries

After an extremely long and devastatingly long wait, EVEN LONGER THAN THE TIME IT TAKES TO GET A TRAIN IN THE UK. It was noticed by someone that goes by the name of 'demoknight tf2'. His eyes glowed a rather bright green colour almost looking like the flames from the combusted ignitions of the bonfire it was found nearby. Which gave off a rather similar look to that of obtaining 4 heads when equipping the Eyelander in Team Fortress 2. The glow in demoknight tf2's eyes was beyond all human comprehension, it was as if he'd found his one true love, the last missing piece to a puzzle, the last hole needing to be filled in his heart. demoknight tf2 picked up the wooden plank with wide opening hands everso carefully, as it was fairly discombobulated and in very poor condition. However, demoknight tf2 thought in his bright shining big iq big pog big brain that it was in the most perfect condition that any wooden plank could possibly get into. He took it straight to the hills of the first point after blu spawn on pl_upward to reconstruct the beauty.

After many many years of continuously dedicated work and needlessly searching around for the perfect requirements. demoknight tf2 came up with an idea that he was guaranteeing would roam the world faster and quicker than blaze's speedshot roaming med picks. demoknight tf2 wanted manoeuvrability when he was doing demoknighting things because the Chargin' Targe and the Splendid Screen just simply wasn't enough to fulfill demoknight tf2's needs. So demoknight tf2 thought of a plan that'll catch the attention of Valve by inventing a shield that makes you do all of the moves like jagger, you got the moves like jagger, you got the moooooooooves like jagger. Anyway, demoknight tf2 loved captain hook and pirates and stuff and he thought of shield + ship = ship wheel = ship shield = ship on water = water shield = wave shield = wave move = tide move = tide turn = Tide Turner. He stopped at Tide Turner and thought that was the perfectly appropriate name for a wheel that makes you do the maneneoriavrvability stuff.

Many months later, demoknight tf2 had gathered all the parts, all the pieces to finally combine everything and behold, Ladies and Gentleman, men and women and children of all ages. Please feast your eyes upon the beauty, the gorgeous the everso great..... T I D E T U R N E R

A major occurrence took place a year after demoknight tf2's invention... and he simply couldn't believe it...

demoknight tf2 was called on his Nokia 105 - 4 MB - Black - Unlocked cellular device by Valve Software Headquarters. He was told that Valve were absolutely in awe of his invention and history behind it and gave demoknight tf2 the absolute privileged honour of introducing the Tide Turner into Team Fortress 2.

demoknight tf2 was in complete shock at the time, that he just trimped straight up the pl_upward hills, flew his way into the cliffs and hit his kill bind.

CAN YOU GUYS BELIEVE IT? THE TIDE TURNER IS IN TEAM FORTRESS 2!!!!!!
SEE LOOK, IT'S RIGHT HERE!

Its official release date is precisely Wednesday 18th June 2014!

However, there's one saddening flaw that will be addressed very very shortly....

Be strong and try to hold in the feelings for the next section, it's rather heartbreaking :(

Yep, you heard me exactly right. We can't track our Tide Turner kills

Sure unique is cool, but not the same
Sure collector's is cool, but big expensive and still not the same

Strange on the other hand. Where is it?

I TOLD YOU, I'M CRYING AS I'M TYPING THIS BRO
Even demoknight tf2 is shedding a few tears at this atrociousness. It takes a lot to make demoknight tf2 sad let alone show it. F for our demoknight tf2 ;-;

It's hard to say that this isn't even a joke at all Valve. Yes you Valve, there's no strange tide turner, the official TF2 Wiki says so right here VALVE. So, V A L V E, where is it? In a safe that can't be accessed? Sitting in your heads waiting for the perfect moment? No plans for it??????? WHER E NTFJNEINIJAI

We need to know where it is. This guide will prove to you that there's every reason to add it into Team Fortress 2 as soon as possible.

The Splendid Screen has a Strange Quality
The Chargin' Targe has a Strange Quality
The Tide Turner DOESN'T have a Strange Quality

The only shield that can manoeuvre easily cannot be strange???
Valve pls ;w;

All we ask for is to see this picture on the TF2 Wiki when it get released hopefully....one day.....

All hope isn't lost for we have this guide that will go viral and we have external software communities to get the Strange Tide Turner to exist in Team Fortress 2!

You can sign this petition[secure.avaaz.org] that I've made so one day we'll send it to Valve when it's signed an extremely significant amount of times! Eventually it'll happen, I promise <3

You can also join SolarLight's discord server called demoknight tf2 right here![discordapp.com]

gib the following items in strange too:

• eureka effect cos it's useful now

• sticky jumper/rocket jumper because the models look like sex toys so it needs a balance yes?

• nessie's nine iron cos golf

• vita-saw cos ok

MAINLY THE TIDE TURNER BUT IT'S TIME TO SHARE THE LOVE

Thank you for reading the history and the wonderful story behind why the Tide Turner is such a beautiful yet so creative piece of art that needs its recognition in the form of a Strange Quality in Team Fortress 2 so we can finally track the kills on our prized possessions that we've all always wanted to be able to do!

I love you and always remember....

demoknight tf2