Recent reviews by Goblin

I have become living proof that there needs to be a "Rimworld addict anonymous".

This game's detective mechanics are in fact so good that I couldn't figure out the tutorial mission.

Literally couldn't play it. 10/10

I'm not going to lie to you, the game isn't HORRIBLE, but it's just not . . . GOOD.

There wasn't much of a "Fallout: New Vegas in space" feel to it. And on top of that, the game wasn't balanced at all. I wasn't even on story mode, but it FELT like it.

To start, I got some pretty damn decent armor pretty early in the game, but I decided to test out just how much of a cake-walk the game really was by taking it off and switching to a piece of clothing with 0 armor. No buffs, no debuffs, no protection. And wouldn't you know it, I was absolutely destroying any enemies that I was put up against.

What made me think the game was easy was when I got in a shoot-out with some spacer's choice goobers. It was pretty easy, which doesn't seem right considering they were cooperate goons with LITERAL ARMOR and heavy weaponry and I was just some disgruntled ice cream cone with a pistol.

What made me think the game was holding your hand tighter than a parent guiding their 3-year-old son to first base during a game of Tee-ball was the fact that I ran into, not one, not two, but THREE primals. Which were pretty cool mechanically. Bullet sponges, threw rocks at you if you got on higher ground, etc, but they were doing like no damage to me. (I still didn't have any armor on.) They took a good while to kill, but I came out only using the inhaler once.

Finally, Fallout New Vegas is a great game because of factors like it's compelling story, which has AMAZING writing in the main story, the side quests, and even the environment. And Outer Worlds seems to just be, like, copying it. It feels like copying down your friend's homework, but getting some answers wrong on purpose in order to seem original, but it even fails at LOOKING original. One of the early quests have to do with going to the top floor of a tower (not as big as the Lucky 38 from FNV, and it sure as hell isn't in a piece of a beautiful city like Las Vegas, but stay with me here.) and riding an elevator to the top in order to meet the mayor, who just so happens to give you a job that will decide the fate of the city and it's citizens. (The Mr. House questline). The quest we're talking about involves you redirecting power from a place taken over by robots to the town that the mayor runs, or you could send it to a different community who may need the power more. (That one quest you get at Helios 1).

AND on top of that? Your player character starts out by being woken up from a good long cryostasis nap, and instantly thrown into action, which is clearly LARGELY inspired by Fallout 4. The game simply isn't original RIGHT OFF THE BAT.

I went ahead and refunded it, and I'll probably use my money on something that I think I will enjoy much more than this mediocre game.

Ran in circles with a dead guy over my shoulder for multiple days, got beat up by hobos, then kidnapped my Mormon Christians.

Worst game I've ever played. 10/10 !!

I'm gonna start by giving credit where it's due.

This game is friggin beautiful. I'm usually not one for graphics, but damn. This just felt...different. And not to mention that this was made with the source engine. The devs clearly knew exactly what they were doing, and I respect them a ton for it.

My problem is that this game simply isn't really for everyone. Most of the little bit of time I spent playing was me back-tracking a ton because I didn't know where to go. That, and the lack of things I personally found interesting.

(I will note that I found a breaking bad reference, and that was funny as hell.)

But overall, Yeah. This just isn't my kind of game, and I don't recommend it if you're not already familiar with the kind of game that this is.

The few puzzles that I ran into were simple, and, admittedly, pretty neat. The parkour though...oh, man. I am not gonna sugarcoat it. I hated the parkour. Another good chunk of my playtime was me dying in this flooded generator room that had electrified the water. So much as dip your toes in it, you're dead. The HP system doesn't matter right there, because your health is instantly dropped to zero.

It's also hard for me to play this because I've gotten so used to having a little arrow on my screen that tells me where to go. I think the idea of "just figure it out" is cool, but again, not for me.

I will say, however, that I was tempted to keep playing because of what little story was presented to me, and how it was presented. The story is pretty cool, but the gameplay which I'm simply in NO way familiar with whatsoever kinda makes it hard for me to enjoy.

That said, I don't recommend this to people who are like me. Given markers, given objectives, given some kind of enemy to run away from, which, yeah. I'm aware of the morko(?) eater egg, but I mean a constant threat. Imagine being chased by that thing throughout the game.
Anyway, I'm getting off-topic, so I'll wrap it up right here.

If you like games where you simply look around, appreciate your surroundings, industrial or natural, and hold your patience as you try to think through things slowly, this game might interesting for you.

With that being said, I'm going to refund this game and simply watch someone play it on YouTube so I can at least get a BIT of the experience this game has to offer without having to worry about what ultimately makes it hard for me to appreciate this probably great game.

The game has potential, don't get me wrong, but it's just horribly executed. And it's very clunky. The experience WOULD have been amazing if I could actually play beyond the opening scene. I got to the point where I had to run like hell to the vault, but when I got to the platform, there were no NPCs, Nora took about 15 minutes to actually get to the vault platform, and then everything just...stopped. The helicopters just circled around, the sirens blared, and the whole experience crashed and burned for me. This was actually closer to being good than most critical reviews say. Giving credit where it's due, the opening scene WAS very enjoyable. Seeing Codsworth actually in front of me put a big grin on my face, I even hugged him with my non-existent arms. The player model is just the Oculus 2 controllers I was using, so there was no model, but by God it still felt good to give my favorite character in my second favorite fallout game a big ol hug.

Back on topic, no. I wouldn't buy this game if I were you.

Edit: most of the pics of people with real hands and cool graphics, those are mods. You'd need to mod the game in order for it to be good, which I didn't do, because I'm running low on storage.

If cocobeans come from trees, does that make chocolate a vegetable?

This game has been a thing since I was an early teenager, and it is still an AMAZING game!

It has multiple campaigns, which always gives you the option to think tactically or to go for strength in numbers and let RnG handle the rest, and a sandbox mode which gives you access to all of the different factions and units. (except for the special units. You can use them, but you have to find them first! (can we get much higher(oh oh oh)))

This game also has a love for creating their own units and uploading them to the mod manager. You will often find units from historical battles, or (in my experience) Star Wars characters. And one punch man.

There is also no repetition! You can do the same battle over and over, and it might not get old for a good while!

It's a tech demo. Nothing more. It's a 30 minute little thing that not only gives a little tall tale for Gordon freeman, but it also gives multiple bits of info for things like how the games are glued together in the first place.

Like I said, It's a tech demo, so it's not like a half-life 3 or anything, but rather a little side story with some neat info. Plus, the graphics look very nice for a game that came out before the dinosaurs died. The map is nice, has a more Italian feel (in my opinion), and some really fun enemy encounters.

I think it's worth a try if you want a quick experience that can pack a small punch.

10/10

worst game I've ever played