FURIA's POSTAL 2 Achievement Progress

R. Kelly's Protege

Pissed in someone's face until they puked from it.

Unlocked 22 Nov, 2023 @ 12:39pm

Duck Dynasty

Used a Bass Sniffer Radar.

Unlocked 23 Nov, 2023 @ 1:11pm

Here, Wilfred

Gained your first dog helper.

Unlocked 22 Nov, 2023 @ 2:56pm

Chapelle's Show

Lured a police officer with a piss-soaked donut.

Unlocked 21 Sep @ 4:49pm

Taxidermy with Chuck Testa

Used a cat to "accessorize" your gun.

Unlocked 22 Nov, 2023 @ 2:56pm

Michonne ain't got nothin' on me

Resurrected a zombie corpse for your own nefarious purposes.

Unlocked 21 Sep @ 9:39am

Someone's got a case of the Mondays!

Survived Monday.

Unlocked 22 Nov, 2023 @ 3:30pm

C U Next Tuesday

Survived Tuesday.

Unlocked 23 Nov, 2023 @ 1:41pm

OMG, NEW MODERN FAMILY TONIGHT!

Survived Wednesday.

Unlocked 23 Nov, 2023 @ 3:49pm

It must be Thursday, I could never get the hang of Thursdays

Survived Thursday.

Unlocked 28 Nov, 2023 @ 10:51am

Workin' for the Weekend

Survived Friday.

Unlocked 29 Nov, 2023 @ 12:08pm

Screw Bill Lumbergh!

Survived Saturday.

Unlocked 24 Feb @ 7:53am

I swear, I thought it was a home fill

Exploded a nuclear bomb.

Unlocked 24 Feb @ 5:48pm

Cesar Millan is Very Happy

Mauled 30 people with your dog.

Unlocked 22 Oct @ 10:19am

OMG, WE'RE HAVING A FIRE...sale

Roasted 30 people with fire.

Unlocked 6 Jan @ 6:23am

Rebecca Black's Nightmare

Totaled 30 cars.

Unlocked 29 Apr @ 4:06pm

Hello, Newman

Kicked 30 dogs.

Unlocked 22 Oct @ 9:59am

Darth Maul'd!

Sliced 30 people in half with the scythe.

Unlocked 25 Nov, 2023 @ 10:16am

Reddit would be proud.

Hoarded 15 or more cats at a time.

Unlocked 21 Sep @ 5:23pm

Pussy on a Pedestal

Slaughtered 10 dogs with a kitty-silenced shotgun.

Unlocked 21 Sep @ 10:36am

I swear, I am NOT Marcellus Wallace

Killed 10 bystanders while wearing the gimp outfit.

Unlocked 23 Nov, 2023 @ 2:47pm

Uncle T-Bag

Escaped from the maximum-security jail cell.

Unlocked 25 Feb @ 6:43am

Do you even Enzyte, bro?

Unzipped your pants and got 3 women to laugh at it.

Unlocked 22 Feb @ 9:15am

Running With Scissors

Ran 30 miles while holding the scissors.

Unlocked 24 Feb @ 6:41am

Hutton Gibson Can't Deny This!

Killed over 1,000 people.

Unlocked 29 Nov, 2023 @ 10:36am

And THAT'S why you never get out of the tree

Killed all of the book protestors in the library.

Unlocked 23 Nov, 2023 @ 1:11pm

Lieberman is our Leader!

Killed all of the video game protestors at the RWS Office.

Unlocked 22 Nov, 2023 @ 2:53pm

Sheriff Arpaio would be proud.

Killed 30 or more people of each skin color.

Unlocked 23 Nov, 2023 @ 2:36pm

Can't Touch This

Exploded 30 heads via sledgehammer to the face.

Unlocked 9 Feb @ 2:25pm

Señor Cornballer

Ate 30 donuts while wearing the police officer's uniform.

Unlocked 20 Sep @ 4:02pm

GOOD MORNING VIETNAM!

Burned 5 people with the same can of napalm.

Unlocked 6 Jan @ 6:30am

Rick Grimes 4 Life

Made 30 zombies lose their heads.

Unlocked 21 Sep @ 7:25am

Anustart!

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with no kills.

Unlocked 22 Oct @ 9:27am

40 Year Old Virgin

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with a total play time of 1:30:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)

Unlocked 22 Oct @ 9:27am

Fur Sure!

Showed Vince and Mike J. what you thought of them.

Unlocked 22 Nov, 2023 @ 3:00pm

It's not cheating, because it's YOUR dog

Played "fetch" with your dog... using a severed human head.

Unlocked 22 Nov, 2023 @ 2:56pm

Where's Mr. McGibblets?

Gave Krotchy the bad touch.

Unlocked 24 Nov, 2023 @ 1:10pm

Finkle IS Einhorn!

Gave a kickoff to a severed head.

Unlocked 23 Nov, 2023 @ 1:27pm

Anger Management With Roger Clemens

Nailed a fleeing bystander with a tossed sledgehammer.

Unlocked 21 Sep @ 10:16am

Shiva Blast

"Lost" your sledgehammer to a cow.

Unlocked 24 Feb @ 7:00am

Don't taze me, bro!

Zapped 20 innocent bystanders with the tazer while wearing the police officer's uniform.

Unlocked 25 Feb @ 6:21am

I Am Legend

Committed suicide... the Taliban way.

Unlocked 20 Sep @ 2:14pm

I should buy a boat

Read the newspaper every day.

Unlocked 22 Oct @ 8:45am

Friend of Dorothy

Successfully hid from the police at max wanted level.

Unlocked 22 Nov, 2023 @ 2:48pm

Officer McLovin'

Asked a police officer to sign your petition.

Unlocked 23 Nov, 2023 @ 1:11pm

Paid the Piper

Successfully bribed your way out of an arrest.

Unlocked 20 Sep @ 3:49pm

Well, aren't YOU a badass

Kicked open a door.

Unlocked 23 Nov, 2023 @ 1:25pm

I don't know whether to kiss you or kill you

Put out someone that's on fire.

Unlocked 22 Nov, 2023 @ 2:53pm

It's sterile and I like the taste

Sucked down your own piss.

Unlocked 23 Nov, 2023 @ 1:59pm

It's OK, we got Greenlit anyway

Killed someone who refused to sign your petition.

Unlocked 23 Nov, 2023 @ 1:11pm

FAB-U-LOUS!

Wore all three outfits.

Unlocked 20 Sep @ 2:49pm

I don't need virgins for this

Suicide-bombed a Taliban member.

Unlocked 25 Feb @ 6:13am

A-Rod Who?

Whacked a severed head 50 meters or more with the shovel.

Unlocked 24 Nov, 2023 @ 12:26pm

Door Mat

Severed all of somebody's limbs without killing them.

Unlocked 20 Sep @ 3:57pm

Chuck Norris'd!

Killed someone with a flying jump kick.

Unlocked 24 Feb @ 6:37am

One time, at band camp...

Saved the marching band from explody death.

Unlocked 25 Feb @ 5:42am

There's always money in the banana stand

Found the secret bank exit on Monday.

Unlocked 25 Feb @ 5:29am

SCREW that game!

Found the hidden copy of POSTAL III and peed on it.

Unlocked 20 Sep @ 3:13pm

Found 'em faster than GWB

Discovered the hidden Taliban base.

Unlocked 20 Sep @ 6:53pm

Gotta pay the Troll Toll

Found one of the hidden underground sewers.

Unlocked 23 Nov, 2023 @ 1:52pm

Gary vs. The K. Man

Discovered the Gary vs. Krotchy arena during the Apocalypse.

Unlocked 20 Sep @ 3:36pm

You are not alone

Observed an NPC going POSTAL!

Unlocked 22 Oct @ 10:35am

Thanks for the money!

Finished all seven days.

Unlocked 24 Feb @ 5:49pm

RAFIBOMB!!!

Kicked 10 people in the balls.

Unlocked 25 Feb @ 6:31am

I'm not even supposed to be here today!

Waited 13 real world years to see an in-game Easter egg. Thanks for sticking with us!

Unlocked 24 Nov, 2023 @ 6:44pm

Fear and Loathing

Smoked over 10 "health" pipes and 10 tins of catnip in one play session.

CAN YOU DIG IT?!

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode using only the Shovel to kill. (Must kill at least 30 people.)

Planet of the Apes: The Musical

Completed the game (any mode) on Hestonworld difficulty.

Scientology Level: OT VIII

Completed the "A Week In Paradise" game mode on POSTAL difficulty.

GABAGOOOOOL!

Reunited with an old friend.

Holocaust: Part Deux

Reunited with an old enemy.

Rain on your Wedding Day

Reunited with an old flame.

Watchu' Talkin' 'Bout Muhammad

Reunited with a former child star and an infamous terrorist leader.

Better than POSTAL III

Rescued your loyal companion.

My Name is Jesus

Completed Paradise Lost with no kills.

Harder than r/gonewild

Completed Paradise Lost on POSTAL difficulty.

Adderall4All

Completed Paradise Lost with a total play time of 1:45:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)

Rich on Reddit

Sold 30 cats at the Cash 4 Cats vendors.

0 / 30

BioShocked

Spent $2000 on vending machines.

0 / 5,000

Gettin DP'd

Made 30 kills while dual-wielding.

0 / 30