I’m on the absolute edge of psychosis now daily, I don’t sleep, I don’t eat, my wife is unhappy, I’m an absolute shell of a man. I am in a sales/ service position and I have a real shot at a career that could very realistically net me 6 figures. I was on 6 gpd of Phenibut when I got the job and my meth use was manageable. I started experiencing the god mode and started eating small amounts throughout the day to stay at 200% all the time. Now here we are, just like what or whoever showed me during that one DMT trip that one time. Everyone who I fooled into believing I was actually that charismatic and intelligent now knows. Everyone is watching me spiral out of control and this only ends one way. I lied through my teeth to my manager, after I showed up 30 minutes late, smoked .4 in the shower. They know. They know I’m a junkie. It’s hard being so attractive and agreeable. I am imploding. The self defeating prophecy is almost complete. I always wanted to suffer, I wanted to be homeless I wanted to be alone. Now it’s right at my fingertips my transformation into what I have always known to be my true self is really here. I’m finally a real drug addict. I’m finally going to convince everyone they were wrong. It’s hard being aware of the absolute hell I have created for everyone that loves me. Yet I saved some of that residual to scrape tomorrow and smoke. It’s a testament to human nature and biochemistry that I have been able to communicate articulately and sell serious numbers by just having perfect eyebrows and a soothing voice. To my family. If you see this I’m sorry. To my beautiful wife, I know you’re cheating on me I’ve been documenting snap score and you told me you were working but you got dope dash to the house at 1 and you showered before leaving and you’ll shower when you get back. Location off no reply changed passwords. I might be experiencing psychosis but I’m not dumb. Well, I am a little retarded.