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Yet again, NEVER jerk off to TRAPS, FEMBOYS, OR SISSYS, or you may end up like me.
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I'm just gonna get to the point. I masturbated for the first time last night. I was reading some hentai (anime girl porn) fanfic earlier, and when I went to sleep later that day, all I could think of was hentai. Eventually, I got this strange feeling in my♥♥♥♥♥♥ and I had looked up how to fap a few days ago out of curiosity, so I began to rub my♥♥♥♥♥♥ and some squicky substance came out (you know what it is. we both do). It felt so ♥♥♥♥ing amazing, but I'm disgusted. I mean, it feels wrong, and I'm not interested in sex or anything. It just feels so wrong, like I'm violating myself. This'll probably be my last fap though
snickers
i stuck a win bottle in my vagin
muffled laughter
but then i got drunk because of the wine in my vagin
hearty laffs
and THEN two guys started spitroasting me!
full on laughter
so i started deep-throating a big ass weenie
laughter starts exceeding 90 decibels
and then i got high and raped a guy
laughter is close to approaching 130 decibels
BUT THEN
everyone in a 3km radius has blown out eardrums, the pain threshold is exceeded and quickly increases
CHECK THIS
the military is preparing for the final solution, as now the laughter is a national threat
NO SERIOUSLY
the whole earth is shaken by the loudness of the laughter, like millions of earthquakes around the planet, the human race is taken hostage by Amy Schumer
I SWALLOD THE CUMMIES