Signed by kal-el

ＨＥＬＬＯ，　ＴＨＩＳ　ＩＳ　ＡＤＭＩＮＩＳＴＲＡＴＯＲ　ＯＦ　ＰＯＲＮＨＵＢ™．　
ＷＥ　ＨＡＶＥ　ＮＯＴＩＣＥＤ　ＴＨＡＴ　ＹＯＵ　ＨＡＶＥＮ'Ｔ　ＬＯＧＧＥＤ　ＩＮ　
ＦＯＲ　２　ＷＥＥＫＳ．　Ｉ　ＡＭ　ＪＵＳＴ　ＣＨＥＣＫＩＮＧ　ＴＯ　ＳＥＥ　ＩＦ　
ＥＶＥＲＹＴＨＩＮＧ　ＩＳ　ＯＫＡＹ？　ＡＬＳＯ　ＷＥ　ＨＡＶＥ　ＰＲＥＰＡＲＥＤ　
ＹＯＵ　Ａ　ＬＩＳＴ　ＯＦ　ＶＩＤＥＯＳ　ＦＲＯＭ　ＹＯＵＲ　ＦＡＶＯＵＲＩＴＥ　
ＣＡＴＥＧＯＲＹ　 （ＧＡＹ　ＰＯＲＮ） ．　ＳＥＥ　ＹＯＵ　ＳＯＯＮ

🌸⢀⡀🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸⢀⡀🌸 🌸
🌸🌸⡏⢢⡁⠂⠤⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀ ⠤⠐⢈⡔⢹ 🌸
🌸 ⢿⡀⠙⠆⠀⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠀⠰⠋⢀⡿ 🌸
🌸 ⠈⢷𝓕𝓻𝓲𝓮𝓷𝓭𝓵𝔂 𝓰𝓾𝔂⡾⠁ 🌸 🌸
🌸 🌸⡏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢹🌸 🌸
⣰⠊⠉⠉⠉⡇⠀⠢⣤⣄⠀⠀ ⣠⣤⠔⠀⢸🌸 🌸 🌸
⠙⠓⠒⢦⠀⠱⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⠎🌸 🌸 🌸
🌸🌸⡇⠀⠀⠏⠑⠒⠀⠉⠀⠒⠊⠹🌸🌸🌸🌸
⡎⠉⢹⠀⠙⡶⠃𝓦𝓮 𝓬𝓪𝓷 𝓫𝓮 ⠘⢦⠀⠀⡏⠉⢱ 🌸
⢧⡈⠛⠉⠉⠀⠀⣠𝓯𝓻𝓲𝓮𝓷𝓭𝓼⣄⠀⠉⠉⠋⢁⡼ 🌸
⠀⢉⣿⠖⠚⠛⢋⢀⠀⠀𝓯𝓸𝓻⠀⠀⡀⡙⠛⠓⠲⣿⣄🌸
⠀⢸⡇⠀⡞⠁⠈⡃𝓯𝓾𝓽𝓾𝓻𝓮⢘⠁⠈⢳⠀⠀⠀⢸⡇🌸
⠀⠈⢷⣄⠀⠀⠙⠦⠌⠑⠢⠤⠔⠊⠁⢠⠎⠀⠀⣠⡾⠁🌸
🌸⠈⠛⠲⠤⣤⣀⣀⣀⣀⣠⣤⣚⣡⠤⠖⠛⠁🌸🌸

─▄████▄████▄
██▒▒▒▒█▒▒▒▒██(¯`•´¯)
▀██▒▒▒▒▒▒▒██▀.*•❀•*.
─▀██▒▒▒▒▒██▀.•..(¯`•´¯)
───▀██▒██▀(¯`•´¯)*•❀•*
─────▀█▀…•..*•❀•*

I met this dude in a pistol round. After losing a 1v4, he calmly said, “The Glock is a metaphor for life. Sometimes, no matter how hard you burst or tap, it just doesn’t hit.” I asked him to focus on the game, but he replied, “Focus is the enemy of enlightenment.” He spent the rest of the match throwing decoys at chickens and humming. We lost, but he said, “GGWP, we won spiritually.”

I met him after an insane clutch in CS:GO. We bonded over hours of gaming, late-night snacks, and mutual hatred for smurfs. One night, during a Discord call, he said, “I’ve been working on something.” Curious, I asked him what.
He replied, “Your crosshair.” Suddenly, my screen went black, and his face appeared in the center, whispering, “I am your crosshair now.” I formatted my PC and blocked him. Stay safe out there.