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I can no longer resist the pizza. I open the box and unzip my pants with my other hand. As I penetrate the gooey cheese, I moan in ecstacy. The mushrooms and Italian sausage are rough, but the sauce is deliciously soothing. I blow my load in seconds. As you leave the bathroom, I exit through the front door….

-rep racist little texican with a baaaad additude

Hey, Sebastian! Thanks for wishing me a happy birthday, but between you and me, some moolah would have been nice! Haha, just messing with ya buddy. Sure we should have a nice get-together. Susan can make some of that wicked potato salad! We just have to hope the boys don't get to it before us. You know how they eat like horses, haha! Maybe Steven can bring some of that potato salad to his higher up and get promoted with a medal of deliciousness! Just poking fun. Contact me at TheCrixster85@gmail.com if you want to arrange something.

Dear 🈚 Slim, I :blush: wrote you, :point_up_2: but :thinking: you :point_left: still ain't :skull: callin' I :stuck_out_tongue_winking_eye: left :point_left: my 😀😀😀 cell, :signal_strength: my :smirk_cat: pager :pager: and my 💑🔥👖 home :house_with_garden: phone at the bottom :small_red_triangle_down: I :persevere: sent two letters :abcd: back in :teddy_bear: autumn, :fallen_leaf: you 🕛👊 must :couple: not've got :ok_hand: 'em 👩‍❤️‍💋‍👨 There :heart_eyes: probably :thinking: was a problem at the post office 👩‍💼 or somethin'