＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿
　|　Windows　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　[－][口][×] |
　|￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣ |
　|　Windows a detectado que usted es Gay.　　　　　　　　　　　 I
　| 　¿Eso es cierto?　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　 I　
　|　　　　＿＿＿＿＿＿　　　＿＿＿＿＿＿　　＿＿＿＿＿＿＿　　 I
　| 　　　｜　　Si　　 |　　　｜　Claro　｜ 　 | Con certeza　 |　 　 I
　|　　　　￣￣￣￣￣￣　　　￣￣￣￣￣￣　　￣￣￣￣￣￣￣　　　 |
　￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣+

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      ██║░░██║██╔════╝████╗░██║╚══██╔══╝██╔══██╗██║
      ███████║█████╗░░██╔██╗██║░░░██║░░░███████║██║
      ██╔══██║██╔══╝░░██║╚████║░░░██║░░░██╔══██║██║
      ██║░░██║███████╗██║░╚███║░░░██║░░░██║░░██║██║
      ╚═╝░░╚═╝╚══════╝╚═╝░░╚══╝░░░╚═╝░░░╚═╝░░╚═╝╚═╝

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡼⠛⣙⠛⠳⢦⣀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⣀⣰⠋⣰⣿⠿⠿⢷⣦⡈⢻⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡎⢠⣦⠀⣴⣿⠃⠀⣶⣦⣤⣁⠀⣇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡾⢀⣿⠃⢰⣿⣿⠀⠀⠙⠿⠿⣿⡧⢸⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣼⠀⣼⡏⢀⣿⣿⣿⣷⣤⣀⣀⡀⠀⢀⡼⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢿⠐⠿⠀⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠀⡾⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢈⡷⠀⣶⣿⣿⠛⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⣸⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⡅⠸⢿⡿⢃⡄⢠⣤⣬⡿⢃⣼⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠳⠤⠴⢿⣄⠻⠿⢋⣠⠏⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠳⠶⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⠀⠤⠤⠤⠤⠠⢄⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⡠⢒⡁⡰⣼⣤⢮⡄⢰⣆⠈⠐⢄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⡔⢅⢡⣼⡑⢹⠁⢉⠛⢛⠾⠉⣀⡀⣚⣧⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠸⠆⠀⡜⠀⠈⠂⠀⠊⠀⠃⠐⠊⠀⠈⡏⠉⠆⠀⠀⠀
⠀⡆⠀⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡇⠀⠄⠀⠀⠀
⠀⡇⡰⠋⠀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⠀⠀⡀⠀⠰⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⡰⠿⠁⢘⣷⣤⣭⡖⠀⠀⠘⣠⣤⣤⣡⠦⢧⡤⠀⠀⠀
⡃⠀⠀⠈⠋⠭⡭⢻⠀⠀⠬⠯⠽⠝⠋⠀⠈⠀⡇⠀⠀
⠡⡘⢄⠀⡠⠊⠀⣸⠀⠀⢸⠈⠢⡀⠀⢀⠆⠀⠇⠀⠀
⠀⡇⠀⠑⡄⠀⣀⠧⠀⠀⠠⠆⡀⢸⠔⠁⢰⠈⠀⠀⠀
⠀⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⣤⣄⡠⢔⣠⣀⠈⠁⠀⠀⠈⡀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠘⢄⠀⠀⠀⠈⠂⠤⠤⠄⠊⠀⠀⠀⢀⡜⠁⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⢸⠡⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠠⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⢸⠀⠡⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡠⠁⠀⠰⡀⠀⠀⠀
⣀⠄⠂⠀⠀⠈⠁⠒⠂⠐⠒⠀⠈⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠒⠤⡀

August 2021
Classic
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Comedy God has entered the building: Attack Helicopter
96
I Sexually Identify as an Attack Helicopter

WEE WOO WEE WOO

ALERT! COMEDY GOD HAS ENTERED THE BUILDING! GET TO COVER!

steps on stage

Bystander: "Oh god! Don't do it! I have a family!"

Comedy God: "Heh..."

adjusts fedora

the building is filled with fear and anticipation

God and Jesus himself looks on in suspense

comedy god clears throat

everything is completely quiet not a single sound is heard

world leaders look and wait with dread

everything in the world stops

nothing is happening

comedy god smirks

no one is prepared for what is going to happen

comedy god musters all of this power

he bellows out to the world

"ATTACK"

absolute suspense

everyone is filled with overwhelming dread

"HELICOPTER"

⣞⢽⢪⢣⢣⢣⢫⡺⡵⣝⡮⣗⢷⢽⢽⢽⣮⡷⡽⣜⣜⢮⢺⣜⢷⢽⢝⡽⣝
⠸⡸⠜⠕⠕⠁⢁⢇⢏⢽⢺⣪⡳⡝⣎⣏⢯⢞⡿⣟⣷⣳⢯⡷⣽⢽⢯⣳⣫⠇
⠀⠀⢀⢀⢄⢬⢪⡪⡎⣆⡈⠚⠜⠕⠇⠗⠝⢕⢯⢫⣞⣯⣿⣻⡽⣏⢗⣗⠏
⠀⠪⡪⡪⣪⢪⢺⢸⢢⢓⢆⢤⢀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢊⢞⡾⣿⡯⣏⢮⠷⠁
⠀⠀⠀⠈⠊⠆⡃⠕⢕⢇⢇⢇⢇⢇⢏⢎⢎⢆⢄⠀⢑⣽⣿⢝⠲⠉
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡿⠂⠠⠀⡇⢇⠕⢈⣀⠀⠁⠡⠣⡣⡫⣂⣿⠯⢪⠰⠂
⠀⠀⠀⠀⡦⡙⡂⢀⢤⢣⠣⡈⣾⡃⠠⠄⠀⡄⢱⣌⣶⢏⢊⠂
⠀⠀⠀⠀⢝⡲⣜⡮⡏⢎⢌⢂⠙⠢⠐⢀⢘⢵⣽⣿⡿⠁⠁
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠨⣺⡺⡕⡕⡱⡑⡆⡕⡅⡕⡜⡼⢽⡻⠏⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⣼⣳⣫⣾⣵⣗⡵⡱⡡⢣⢑⢕⢜⢕⡝
⠀⠀⠀⣴⣿⣾⣿⣿⣿⡿⡽⡑⢌⠪⡢⡣⣣⡟⠀
⠀⠀⠀⡟⡾⣿⢿⢿⢵⣽⣾⣼⣘⢸⢸⣞⡟⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠁⠇⠡⠩⡫⢿⣝⡻⡮⣒⢽⠋⠀