If you have intrusive negative thoughts about yourself, I want to tell you something. Most people believe, and will try to tell you, that such thoughts need to be fought off. They will try to help by saying something positive about you. They will encourage you to do the same. But the truth is, that fight is unwinnable and endless. You will die long before you win. A different approach is needed.

But first, the objective needs to be defined. It's not happiness. Happiness is an emotion, and it comes and goes. The goal is actually to reach an equilibrium where you do not feel internally generated intrusive emotions. Where your emotions are working properly: responding to your environment. A "normal" person will not feel any particular emotion at a noticeable level without cause. That is where you want to arrive at; not emotional deadness, but emotional appropriateness.

So how do you get there?