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Step one: The power of love.
It is impossible to defeat someone with the power of love.

Step two: The power of unfathomable violence.
...


If you need to take a personality test you don't have one.
(Or you are crippling depressed in which case no judgement)


Can smoothly play Portal-RTX with the limiting factor being the electricity bill.
Or in other words:
Modded Minecraft to an extent.
Or in other words:
A VRChat public world with 2-3 trusted-users in front of a mirror fully enabled.


When others express their feelings, its an act of "selfcare" and "so important". When I do, its an act of "third degree arson" and "Its not called Crîme Brûlée".

The deathadder is so deadly that even its opposite, the lifesubtractor, is deadly as well.

Money is something that you count and yet you cant say "3 money".

I made a cube that screams when interacted with in VR.

Time management means crying about several things at once to reduce lost time.

"I beg to differ, your honor. It was crafted meticously, to call it an "improvised device" would be an understatement!"

The only friendly HR manager I've talked with wasn't from HR.

Screaming is a form of selfcare.

- Not a mimic.

I once was number one on a Beat Saber world wide scoreboard.

I've cut myself on popcorn... twice.

"The design is very human. Easy to use."

"Ich bin hier, du bist hier, Schnabeltier."

The essential oil I trust in is WD-40.

BÄRENKATAPULT!!!

I, with a burning passion, hate people that are like "Everyone is equal and some are more equal than others."

Did you know that in terms of human compatibility, Vaporeon is most likely to hide your body using acid?

Hating narcissists is not fair: They get put into a bad world and do everything they can to make it worse.

Whenever I play CIV I can't help but URAANIIUUUMM FEVVEERR!!!

Most bobcats are not named Bob and less than 5% of all ducks have attempted world domination while everything in existence in this universe is either a duck or not a duck.

The factory must grow.

"A trebutchet can launch a 90 kilogram projectile over 300 meters."

"This is what forgiveness sounds like. Screaming and then silence."

"I'm not saying that forgiveness is wrong, all I'm saying is a 5$ pipe bo-"

"I'm living in the future... uh-hu..."

"What's the difference between a duck?"

"Sometimes you look at someone acting all nice and whatnot but deep down you know the moment someone tells them that they did something wrong they're gonna go home and microwave their hamster."

*Disgusted noise* You think your're that important that you deserve a FAQ?!
- It all began when my parents didn't show up to my birth...

Your profile says “Germany” so you must be a f*cking N*zi!11!
- Wrong. Me iz just a precizion mechanical engineer, zo nothing ztereotypical.

*Angry Russian noises*
- I can’t really understand you since I don’t play csgo.

Sprich deutsch du H*rensohn!
- Yez.

You committed the crime of being afk midgame!
- It happens rarely and I hate it too.

Do you have any skill whatsoever?
- I can make any room into a panic room.

Can you speak weebish-uwu?
- o-0 … n-no. Of couwse not! BAKA >w<! *blushes angrily*

Are you a weeb?
- I use deoderant.

What kind of music do you like?
- I only listen to quality-trash.

What is the theoretical color confinement and asymptotic freedom of Quantum Chromodynamics?
- Yes.

What do you think about revenge?
- ♪ We are two mariners - Our ships' sole survivors - In this belly of a whale ♪

Do you have some kind of brain damage?
- Just some? I’m pretty sure the only reason I am still somewhat functioning is that I have so
many that they keep body-blocking each other. Which means that I am invincible…

Can you spell “Apple”?
- *Jumps*


Cihaw as survivor:

I unhooked you and you left me to die!
- If I actually did that, it has a good reason. For example: A really annoying challenge I try to complete since ever.

You flashlight clicked in a toxic way!
- No. I absolutely never do that. No tea-bagging also. I simply don’t have the need for it.

You got tunneled, unsafely unhooked and then moried. How dare you not doing any gens?!
- Excuse me, princess.

Cihaw as killer:

You’re bad at this! GG EZ!
- Yes.

You slugged for the 4K!
- Only if I have a challenge for it.

You tunneled!
- I may slug the unhooked survivor but generally I won’t hook them again instantly.


I demand the answer to a question that’s not listed in the FAQ or want to add smt else!
- Go ahead then. Note that things that make no sense or lack the funny may be removed.

Do you accept invites?
- Yesn't