so meow meow

stinkyana, please stop watching "another world" romance anime and spend all your money on "Overwatch" funKO pop. Your grandpa, 臭睾丸, wants you to take over and be in charge of his ♥♥♥♥ sniffing business. Please, please come on over, we've got a lot of ♥♥♥♥. We have a batch of mountain monkey droppings that must be freshly smelled and dated for sale and use. Leave your beautiful kitten game chair with its cat ears on the headrest, stop focusing on writing your Naruto x Saucegay inflatable fanfic, and focus on honoring your ancestors.

Qībǎi gè hànzì

qing ni xie qi bai zhongwen hanzi. qing ni xie si

hello chinesetiana, this is your great grandmother qinchong baba the 3rd on your qin dynasty side of your family. you have been playing to much electronic toy. you must be study or shame to our ancestor for 5000 year. please understand. great granpapa qinchong is so upset he has died from 7 hernias in the past 8 hours. you must become great chinese scientist and save china from pretty femboy epidemic. DELETE TIKTOK and STOP TIKTOK dance. PLEASE do it for great ancestor eet sum kum. WE HAVE LOST ALL RESPECT FROM NEIGHBOR DOWN THE ROAD TIMMY TONG. STOP VIDEO GAME AND TIK TOK DANCE AND FOCUS STUDY AND WORK PLEASE

Hi uhm! This is gonna be really crazy but hear me out? Please? Okay. Right. So my girlfriend goes by bird on her account and she tried to claim it aaaaand *bowomp* username is taken... she uhm, she's really upset? Like. She won't eat, she's kinda refusing to sleep and saying it's stressing her out and that she's worried her friends are gonna forget her or not remember her because of her new name and it's just.. It's just really stressful for her. So I kinda come to you man to woman and have to ask, can you change your name for me? For her? Surely there's another name you've gone by at some point? But for her she's always been Bird and I don't want her having anymore anxiety attacks and with her history of self-harm and the fact we are long distance I am stressing over the fact I might not be there for her when it all becomes too much. This would help me a lot and most importantly you'd make the sweetest girl in the worlds day. So, thank you. It's an appeal to empathy.