Oh, what's the matter, is your Facebook down? Gosh, I couldn't imagine being addicted to something as ♥♥♥♥♥♥ as FACEBOOK. You poor, lost soul, do you feel that? That trembling in your heart, like a piece of you is being ripped out? That's the poison leaving. You may not like it, but it's for the best. Leave that wretched trash heap (and scroll through Reddit instead) and never look back! Be free, brothers!

It has been four hours since I successfully sucked my own penis. Things are different now. As soon as mouth-to-penis contact was made I felt a shock wave through my body. I have reason to believe I have super strength and telekinesis now. Three hours after contact I noticed a van parked on my street but no one has entered or exited the car since its arrival. I fear for my own safety, I'm not sure what sort of power I may have stumbled upon but it's possible that the government has found out. If I don't update this again please send help

░░░░░░░░░░░░ ▄▐
░░░░░░▄▄▄░░▄██▄
░░░░ ▐ ͡° ͜ʖ ͡° ’▌░░░▀█▄
░░░░░▐███▌░░░░░░▀█▄
░░░░░░▀▄▀░░░▄▄▄▄▄▀▀
░░░░▄▄▄██▀▀▀▀
░░░█▀▄▄▄█░▀▀
░░░▌░▄▄▄▐▌▀▀▀
▄░▐░░░▄▄░█░▀▀ U HAVE BEEN BANGED BY THE
▀█▌░░░▄░▀█▀░▀
░░░░░░░▄▄▐▌▄▄
░░░░░░░▀███▀███▀██▀██▀██▀░▄
░░░░░░▐▌▀▄▀▄▀▐▄SPOOKY BOOTY BANGER
░░░░░░▐▀░░░░░░▐▌
░░░░░░█░░░░░░░░█
░░░░░▐▌░░░░░░░░░█
░░░░░█░░░░░░░░░░▐▌POST THIS ON 6 STEAM PAGES OR GET DIAGNOSED AS HIV-

……..|::::::::,-': : : : : : : : - -~''''¯¯''-„: : : : : :\
……..|::::::::|: : : : : : : : : _„„--~'''''~-„: : : : : '|
……..'|:::::::,': : : : : : :_„„-: : : : : : : : ~--„_: |'
………|::::::|: : : „--~~'''~~''''''''-„…_..„~''''''''''''¯¯|
………|:::::,':_„„-|: : :_„---~: : :|''¯¯''''|: ~---„_: |
…….. ,~-,_/'': : : |: _ o__): : |: : : :|_o__): \.. |
……../,'-,: : : : : ''-,_______,-'': : : : ''-„______\
……..\: :|: : : : : : : : : : : : : :„: : : : :-,: : : : : :\
………',:': : : : : : : : : : : : :,-'__: : : :_',: : : : ,'
……….'-,-': : : : : :___„-: : :'': : ¯''~~'': ': : ~--|
………….|: ,: : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : :|
………….'|: \: : : : : : : : -,„_„„-~~--~--„_: : : |
…………..|: \: : : : : : : : : : : :-------~: : : : : |
I tell ya hwat, you just got visited by the friendly propane man

IF U WERE KILLED TOMORROW, I WOULDNT GO 2 UR FUNERAL CUZ ID B N JAIL 4 KILLIN DA PERSON THAT KILLED U!
......__________________
...../_==o;;;;;;;;______[]
.....), ---.(_(__) /
....// (..) ), ----"
...//___//
..//___//
WE TRUE HOMIES
WE RIDE TOGETHER
WE DIE TOGETHER

SEND DIS PISTOL 2 10 OF UR HOMIES IF YOU GET 5 BACK UR 100% ♥♥♥♥♥

░░░░░▄▀▀▀▄░░DANK░░
▄███▀░◐░░░▌░BIRD░░░
░░░░▌░░░░░▐░░░AYY░░
░░░░▐░░░░░▐░░░LMAO░░
░░░░▌░░░░░▐▄▄░░░░░░
░░░░▌░░░░▄▀▒▒▀▀▀▀▄
░░░▐░░░░▐▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▀▀▄
░░░▐░░░░▐▄▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▀▄
░░░░▀▄░░░░▀▄▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▀▄
░░░░░░▀▄▄▄▄▄█▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▀▄
░░░░░░░░░░░▌▌░▌▌░░░░░
░░░░░░░░░░░▌▌░▌▌░░░░░
░░░░░░░░░▄▄▌▌▄▌▌░░░░░