LMAO imagine being called Alfie unironically

my dad grounded me from my ps2 one time because I said "suck my ass bitchboy" when he asked me to do the dishes so I stole his phone and took a bunch of pictures of my ♥♥♥♥ and emailed them to all his coworkers with a followup email that said "oh no my sexy ass son must have taken my phone again haha sorry fellas" and not an hour later the cops showed up to my house and batista bombed my dad through the ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ couch and took his ass away for diddling my penis moral of the story is if youre reading this dad I'm coming for you when they release you from prison in 2022 nobody takes my ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ ps2 away

^ massive ♥♥♥ +rep kappa