The Tale of the Elite MLG No-scoper

Once upon a time, there was an Elite MLG no-scoper that could 360 no-scope your mum from across the map without using a controller. One day, when he was smoking some pot, some non-MLG hardscopers went up to him.

"giv me us some of ur mad kush ♥♥♥." said the scrublord "or we will ♥♥♥♥♥ rek u m8." said the other scrublord.

The Elite MLG no-scoper replied, "get your own kush cpt ♥♥♥♥" and quickscoped the two scrublords so hard that they dropped their Doritos bags.

The scrublords fell on their knees and begged the pro no-scoper to teach them in his ways, but he couldn't because they were both non-MLG, and no-scoped.

Another day, a nine year old boy decided to join a match on MW2 with the no-scoper. The boy attempted to hardscope the MLG no-scoper but failed, since he was a nerd who didn't even know how to scope. In return, the MLG no-scoper trickshotted the boy so hard that the boy threw his controller across the room and burned his own copy of MW2.

The MLG no-scoper said to this, "get rekt scrub." and drank a can of Mountain Dew.

The next day, the no-scoper decided to watch Shrek 2 while eating Doritos, when he got an e-Mail from Faze himself. The email read: "dear no-scoper, i have watched ur MLG no-scoping montages and decided that u have what it takes to b in faze." But the no-scoper replied, "nah bro i am 2mlg4u" and denied Faze's offer. Enraged, Faze sent out his best quickscopers to go pwn the no-scoper. Once the quickscopers arrived at his house, they rekt the door and camped for 5 hours straight.

"weve been w8ing 4 5 hours n he isnt here" said one of the quickscopers.

"ye and this shrek movie has been on 4 a while" said a different one.

Then, Shrek came out of the TV and 420 blasted the quickscopers as they stood.

"shrekt." said Shrek.

Finally, the no-scoper came out from his camping spot and hardscoped Shrek.

He felt pretty bad that there were so many cheeky, fedora-wearing scrublords in the world, so he decided to play MW2 and eat Doritos. When he got on his Xbox Live account, he saw that he had over +100 messages from Faze Clan, asking him to face them on CoD. The pro no-scoper laughed at how hard those noobs raged and replied, "♥♥♥ off. none of u will b as gr8 as a no scoper as i will ever be." So after rekting some 7 year-olds on CoD, he had gotten a party invite from his mentors: snipars, vagabonds, BigFCKNGun and Pyrocynical.

"where the ♥♥♥ hav u been, kunt?" asked vagabonds.

"m8 we need to rek that scrublord faze." said snipars.

"ye do it or i will rek u m8 n dont forget to subscribe to my channel." agreed BigFCKNGun

"where the ♥♥♥ is newfkers?" asked Pyrocynical.

After smoking pot and practicing 360 no-scoping, the MLGers joined a match with Faze and his army of ♥♥♥ hardscopers. Faze and all of Faze Clan was rekt, being no-scoped, quick-scoped, trick-shotted, and head-shotted. The match was almost over, and the no-scoper and his mentors needed only one more kill. Faze, like the scrublord he was, camped in a building, waiting for the no-scoper to approach. The no-scoper walked out in plain sight and Faze fired. All the bullets missed, and the no-scoper got the final kill.

He 360 no-scoped, hardscoped, quickscoped, trickshotted, headshotted, proneshotted, crouchshotted, nutshotted, combat axed, semtexed, 420 blasted, swan dived Faze from across the map. The final kill cam was so awesome that it made Call of Duty/FPS History and made everyone's MW2 account melt and their Xbox Live accounts crash. And so ends the tale of the MLG Elite no-scoper.