I am hands down the greatest thing to ever happen. I would say that I am "God's gift to the Universe" if not for the fact I was crafted not by some man-in-the-sky but by sheer condensd willpower. However, I exaggerate many things. ALL things, perhaps! I, this most wondorous of beings, am Captain Jimothy "Woofums" Stuart*, SPACE EXPLORER!!! Also, Lord of the Seven Provinces, El Presidente del Chocolate, Minion #3, Crusader of Justice**, Dragon-Emperor of the Boars and King of all that the Light touches (as well as everything else).***
* My name is not Jimothy Stuart, I am not a Captain and nobody calls me Woofums.
** "Justice."
*** All are self given titles that are occasionally humored by more rational folk. Although, I do give one hell of a psychotic laugh on occassion (or whenever the hell I feel like it).