If you ask Rick Astley for a DVD of the movie Up, he won’t give it to you because he’s never gonna give you Up. However, by not giving you Up like you asked for it, he’s letting you down. This is known as the Astley paradox.

SQUID GAMES!!!

Feet.What else can I say?Absolutely marvelous.Stupendous.Utterly amazing,l'd say.The scale,the size,the shape all perfect.The perplexing scent may seem,to put it in the peasants language,nasty,at first,but as you truly realize the beauty of feet,it grows on you.It's an incredible metaphor for life-even the most perfect thing will have a flaw, but it too must be appreciated,and in a way,it improves said thing even more.But the best part is,undoubtedly,the taste.Ohh,ahh.. scrumptious! Splendid! If it were up to me,i'd lick them all day,everyday From the very tip of the heel to the ends of every single toe,as my tongue slowly drifts across the deserted surface.The burn you feel on your tongue feels odd and makes you feel uneasy at first,but it's part of the experience,and soon enough you learn to love it,as you start feeling it permanently.It's all you can feel But sucking the toes is truly the highlight.The mere thought of sticking them in my mouth makes me ejaculate in mere seconds...

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░░░░░░▐▌▀▄▀▄▀▐▄SPOOKY BOOTY BANGER
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If my girl👧😍 and my fidget spinners 💯🔥 are both drowning🌊😦 and I could only save one😄☝️️ you can Catch me letting it spin at my girls funeral😅👻💀 Cause it's fidget spinner or catch a fade my ♥♥♥♥♥🙏👊

I've been noticing an unusual trend in the quality of Snickers bars over the last decade. I found an old one from 5 years ago and decided to study its composition under my spectrometer and discovered something unnerving. The Snickers bar currently sold in stores contains 43.67% less rare earth elements by weight, when compared to one sold 5 years ago. Do they think they can fool us? It's hard to wrap my mind around why they would do this. Thorium used to make up 12% of the bar, but now it's at 8%, and now there's only 4% Americium compared to 7% just a while ago. It's all been replaced by organic carbon-based matter, like sucrose and poorly crafted carbohydrates. I'm disappointed in the Mars corporation, and I hope my findings will gain enough publicity to force Mars into reverting back to the old formula. Consider this an open letter.