This is from the administrator of nhentai ™
We've noticed you haven't logged in for a month now. We're just checking to see if everything's okay with our biggest fan. Since your last visit, we've updated the Futanari Section with many doujinshis we know you'll enjoy. See you there soon!

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░░███░▌▄█▌░░▀░░▀██░░▀██████▌You've been visited by autist loli-sama!
░░░▀█▌▀██▀░▄░░░░░░░░░███▐███ Send this pasta to at least 10 lolicons,
░░░░██▌░░░░░░░░░░░░░▐███████▌or you will never get a real waifu.
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Stabs

For some, however, the idea of carbon monoxide poisoning is extremely appealing. To successfully pull off a carbon monoxide poisoning, several items are needed:

a rubber hose
panty hose
a family sedan
paintings of your children in sexually suggestive poses
nylon stockings
a mix tape of your favorite songs about carbon monoxide
duct tape
twelve inches of yellow string, exactly
When these items are obtained, take them to your local auto shop and say "I want the Delp Special". They'll probably laugh at you and tell you not to waste their time. Smother them with a pillow, it doesn't matter now. You can't be made fun of like that. Use their lift to hook the hose up from exhaust to slightly cracked window. Say something poetic about life. Step inside your car (fitted with Monoxotech Co. Quality Alarms) and feel the sweet, sweet freedom of death, CO style. "Now that's the way to go! ®"

I hate it when someone rides my ass while driving, so I have developed the best defense for these ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥. I have decided to share it with you my /b/rothers.

1. get the following items from your local Wal-mart.

A water baby (in the girls toy aisle where the lolis roam.) It is a regular looking baby doll with a hollow body that is supposed to be filled with warm water to make the doll all soft and jiggly like a real, no-boned baby.

3 jars of strawberry preserves. (It has to be preserves, jams and jellys don't work as well.

2. Fill the water baby with the strawberry preserves until it just about to bust and dress the baby with the clothes that came with it.

3. The next time someone rides your ass, throw the baby out of your window onto their windshield. The will see a jiggly baby go flying toward them and then explode into a pile of bright red and chunky gore.

4. The driver stops and is traumatized for life or gets in a wreck and dies. Either way, that ♥♥♥♥♥ is off your ass.

nu o