hamspanker
smelly   United States
 
 
i woke up around ten o clock in the mornin
i gave myself a stretch up, a mornin yawn and
went to the bathroom to wash up
i threw some soap on my face and put my hands on a cup
and said "mirror mirror, on the wall, who is the top Dogg of them all?"
there was a rubble dubble, five minutes it lasted
the mirror said "you are, you conceited bastard"
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Currently Offline
crim 12 Jun, 2018 @ 4:47am 
man
sh00st 28 Sep, 2013 @ 4:17pm 
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hamspanker 6 Sep, 2012 @ 9:33pm 
oh handyman that was u? my bad lmao
sh00st 11 Aug, 2012 @ 2:51pm 
Late one night in 1996 I was lost in downtown Pittsburgh and a young man helped me find my way to a bus stop. He refused any payment and deflected my many thanks with grace. As I stepped on the bus to go back home, I realized I had never asked the man his name. As the bus pulled away I yelled to him from the window. He did not reply.

Last year I was in Pittsburgh on business again and was staying downtown in the Omni. After a long work day I decided to stay in for the night and order room service. A few minutes later a young man arrived with a tray containing my entree and a complimentary flute of champagne. He mentioned that he was required to stay and take back my tray after I had finished. After only a few sips of the champagne, I began to feel immensely drowsy. As I began to lose consciousness I recognized him as the young man from before. He stood up and began to disrobe. Right before I passed out I felt him enter me and heard him whisper "My name is hamspanker."
CHUK 18 Apr, 2012 @ 8:02pm 
Hey, you're that guy that ♥♥♥♥♥♥ Marylin Monroe. Niiice....
sh00st 17 Apr, 2012 @ 10:48am 
U ARE A TRU WEDSMOK STONER