Recent reviews by The Uncleanest One

The OST is pretty good.

This game is great. A little bit complicated and not for everyone but, if you enjoy management games and the absolute chaos of what this game will throw at you, you'll be set for a great time.

Sometimes you'll have demons in your tavern, drinking and reciting poetry to your dwarves while searching for a musical band. Other times a cave crocodile will sneak past your defenses in the caverns and eat the testicles of every dwarf while they sleep. Other times you'll f*ck up something and loose your entire fortress. You'll entomb someone that got possesed, and eventually open his tomb and create a cockup cascade that'll leave you with a single dwarf. Other times some rat boy will come and steal from you a barrel of milk.

The ammount of f*cked up sh*t that will happen to you in this game is amusing enough to recomend the game. But the gameplay is still really good.

If you hate yourself, play this game. You will regret it.

I can play as a big fat nurgly boy and, thus, this game's great.

Bunny girls are the best. Change my mind.

This is the best game ever, why?

10/10, would create a free gulag again.

Have you ever wanted to be the driver of a big ass train?
Have you ever wanted to derail trains for fun?
Have you ever wanted to spend hours of your life carrying materials left to right?
And lastly, do you like T R A I N Z ?

If so, this game's for you.

War Thunder is a magnificent game for the masochist. I once compared it to being trapped with Somalian pirates while having Stockholm Syndrome, but right now, as it stands, comparing that to this game is an insult to every Somalian pirate out there.

This game is a pain in the ass for everyone thanks to the magnificent decisions of Gaijin. The economy of this game is f*cked beyond relief. In anything you want to do, you better have that wallet ready or else. The fustration this gives you is enough to get someone on a psych ward. The map design is atrocious, paired with the absolute dogsh*t balance of the game itself.

The ammount of time you'll need, even by paying everything there is to pay, to reach anything is massive per faction, and even if you reach what you want, then you have to upgrade the vehicle. After that, you'll have to deal with the best mechanic created by man: Repair costs. This mechanic would work on a MMORPG which needs to watch out for their currency's inflation to maintain the player economy in check. Examples of these types of games would be WoW, FFXIV, Neverwinter, etc. In this game there's no thing as player trades, auction houses or any interaction with in-game currency a part from the game itself. This makes repair costs be at the end of the day one thing: A method of fustration in which to poke you to pay.
The reasoning for this is simple: Every match you get arround 2k xp if you're lucky, and you need to research for a top tier vehicle arround 340k xp. This will take you weeks, even months, without a premium vehicle and premium time. Now, everytime you want to increase your xp on that vehicle, you have to pay your current vehicle's repair costs, meaning that if you ♥♥♥♥ up and loose, you'll end up loosing money. If you're in a nation like: Britain, Japan, France, Italy or Israel, you'll continually loose money forcing you that, at the end of the research period you'll waste a couple of days or weeks farming the money to be able to buy the vehicle. After that, you'll need to spend more weeks unlocking the upgrades of the vehicle to make it playable.
Basically this over and over again, constantly.
And the grind is very long, just the big 3 nations, on one of the folders, has arround 100+ vehicles. And Gaijin has constantly raised repair costs and reduced XP and currency earning modifiers to enlargen that grind. And the straw that broke the cammel's back was that arround 6 months ago they made the community vote on a new economy system, selling it as "standardizing the economy", people thought it was going to standarize all prices equally arround all nations based on tier. In reality it kept it the same, just making nations that had it better off in repair costs more expensive. And on the 16th of this month they decided to completely overhaul it, making everything the same, but on the higher end of being expensive, and reducing even more the modifiers.

The community backlash has been so big they have backtracked but, now they've decided to post the most tone deaf, cynical sh*t they could. In basic terms, Gaijin is a lazy ass company that prefers to accuse it's customers of not being thankful enough, while hidding themselves on nonsensical arguments and cynical analises of how economies of services work. They are right about the 80/20 rule, but it does not mean that 80% of the players don't pay, it just means that 80% of everything they get is made by the 20% of the population of the game. That 20% of income is made by the 80% of the rest of the community, which is nothing to gawk at.
They say that they use statistics to balance sh*t out, but instead of changing how the vehicle works to make it better or worse regarding it's positioning, they'll just decrease or increase the price based on statistics that have nothing to do with the reality of the game. They also say that "adjusting the economy takes weeks of work" but they f*cking do an economy update every f*cking month. We have to wait 3 months to get an update, a big one that adds a couple of vehicles, while most of those vehicles in recent time are for the overpopulated nations and premiums, while every month, this thing that takes so much work and is basically useless gets an update every month.
All that is basically bullsh*t, if this jack sh*t system is so hard to work with, either delete it completely so you can focus on important stuff and stop loosing dev time on this sh*t or simplify it completely so you don't have to work on it. The real reason they keep pushing this sh*t system is because at the end of the day they get money by doing this.
And thus you have a game that could be excelent, great even, ruined by every incompetent, negligent and absolute batsh*t insane decision the company makes.

Europa Universalis IV is a good game, don't get confused, it's a fantastic game but, it has one problem and it has to do with the DLC policies of the developers. First let's talk about the product itself, it's a grand strategy game situated betwen the years 1444 and 1821, and it has everything you'll want on a game of this characteristics. Now, on to the real issue that kills this game, the DLC's.

Europa Universalis IV has a ♥♥♥♥ ton of DLC's for something as basic as developing your provinces, making your ruler abdicate or beign able to see the timelapse of your game when it ends or create your custom nation. There are tinnier DLC's that are cosmetic changes and music changes, like the Sabaton Soundtrack, but those are cheap and do not affect in the gameplay mechanics themselves. In short, by buying EU4 without any DLC's is like buying half a game, and the DLC's that complete it are not cheap. A triple AAA game costs 60/70€, this game if you want to get the full experience will cost you 204.99€ and it's still going up.

As a business point of view this is perfect, specially for the type of game they are creating, Europa Universalis is a game that new players won't come constantly, so by giving a half finished game and then adding new content by DLC's worth 20€ and then giving the cosmetic content pack that it should come with separately you milk the veteran player's wallet and your game becomes profitable for a long time. But, for a consumers perspective this is awfull. I personally would preffer to pay 60€, even 100€ for the full game than having to pay 20€ every time a new DLC comes out, because it's not a DLC that adds new content, it adds mechanics for certain countries that should already be in the game like the Mandate of Heaven for China and different mechanics for religions already in the game or things as simple as developing your provinces.

For a new player that has a lot of money and is willing to spend it on a grand strategy game, I recomend EU4. For a new player that does not have that ammount of money, do not even buy it there are more cheap options than this one.