life life life is full of mysteries

mysteries life is full of hardships you

said it again sister sometimes it's hard

to open a jar yeah sometimes it's hard

to clean the sink yeah and if you're not

careful you just might fall and not get

up yeah well guess what what we can make

your life just a little bit easier how

why mags

hell yeah why pax can make your life no

way way oh yeah having a hard time

getting that stain off the wall

well now you can just add a few drops of

lemon and that state will go right away

oh yeah are you having a hard time

smoking and eating at the same time well

now you can put both cigarettes in your

nose thanks my pax you're home yeah are

you tired of asking for ketchup all the

time hey pop well here's an alternative

can I get a hot wrap around in your

mouth all day and get ready to use it

when you're ready

yeah oh yeah

oh yeah do you want pearly white teeth

the natural way now you can do it for

cheap white yeah do you want to lose

weight but hate exercise well now

there's an alternative you can become

believing all teenagers are doing oh

yeah are you tired of dealing with women

under ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ well now you can change

your sexual preference about homosexual

♥♥♥♥♥ for life is your pet misbehaving

now you can place your bed in a nice

long sock

do you hate doing the dishes well fear

no more you can take your ♥♥♥♥ out of

this existential nightmare are those

birds outside chirping a little too loud

well just ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ kill them are your

loud neighbours keeping you up at night

we just ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ kill them are you an

irrational radical feminist well here's

a tip get lady fat piece of ♥♥♥♥ are you

an irrational radical anti-feminist well

here's a tip get laid you fat piece of

♥♥♥♥ can't reach the remote job even

sweaty now you can call upon the demons

of cells are aah

we'll take care of anyway

school sucks well thank goodness there's

a way to get out of school just call an

anonymous bum friend a lot of life hacks

if you know what I mean had too much to

eat do you need to take your food on the

go just put it in your pocket and you

can eat it anywhere you can even eat it

in the bar you mind if I take a little

seat here yeah

bra bra you want some yeah it's just a

prank bro

ravioli ravioli what's in the pocket

oh my lord

Abbi holy ravioli what's in the pocket

over there

it's just a prank bro it's just a prank

are you afraid of death and eternal

darkness well good news you can choose

to believe in an afterlife oh yeah did

you spill your water look at this stupid

piece of ♥♥♥♥

do you hate being shot at by the police

well here's a simple Turnus just don't

be black social commentary having

trouble staying awake to do your

homework well that's what cocaine is for

it'll wake you right oh oh yeah yeah

unwanted pregnancy oh dear

get rid of it the natural way drink some

nail polish remover

oh yeah oh yeah are you horny

well now you can make your own personal

sex doll first you grab an orange got a

nice penis shaped hole in the orange put

the orange away and put a bunch of

roofies in your drink and then beat it

to it try this it's gonna make you feel

real good go make you real here

do you hate cleaning it's that darn

pickles yard is your neighbor's tree

Bhima just doing is your light bulb

broken just do it and are you looking

for vitamins smell that ♥♥♥♥ it's

♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ good huh oh do you want to start

a garden ah yeah because life doesn't

happen to you it happens for you how do

I know this I don't but I'm making sound

and that's the important thing

it's filthy Frank for the ♥♥♥♥♥♥

it's filthy break this let's get some

♥♥♥♥♥ tonight

taking the trash out can be a bit of a

ass just call upon the demons themselves

are black magic oh yeah