Magic Mushroom's POSTAL 2 Achievement Progress

R. Kelly's Protege

Pissed in someone's face until they puked from it.

Unlocked 3 Jan, 2015 @ 2:42pm

Duck Dynasty

Used a Bass Sniffer Radar.

Unlocked 7 Jan, 2015 @ 7:13pm

Here, Wilfred

Gained your first dog helper.

Unlocked 29 Jan, 2015 @ 10:45am

Taxidermy with Chuck Testa

Used a cat to "accessorize" your gun.

Unlocked 29 Jan, 2015 @ 10:45am

Someone's got a case of the Mondays!

Survived Monday.

Unlocked 16 Feb, 2015 @ 2:54am

C U Next Tuesday

Survived Tuesday.

Unlocked 16 Feb, 2015 @ 4:46am

OMG, NEW MODERN FAMILY TONIGHT!

Survived Wednesday.

Unlocked 17 Feb, 2015 @ 3:40pm

It must be Thursday, I could never get the hang of Thursdays

Survived Thursday.

Unlocked 19 Feb, 2015 @ 10:15am

Workin' for the Weekend

Survived Friday.

Unlocked 19 Feb, 2015 @ 12:57pm

Screw Bill Lumbergh!

Survived Saturday.

Unlocked 19 Feb, 2015 @ 2:21pm

I swear, I thought it was a home fill

Exploded a nuclear bomb.

Unlocked 20 Feb, 2015 @ 4:09am

Cesar Millan is Very Happy

Mauled 30 people with your dog.

Unlocked 19 Feb, 2015 @ 3:41pm

OMG, WE'RE HAVING A FIRE...sale

Roasted 30 people with fire.

Unlocked 6 Jan, 2015 @ 9:16am

Darth Maul'd!

Sliced 30 people in half with the scythe.

Unlocked 19 Feb, 2015 @ 12:52pm

Reddit would be proud.

Hoarded 15 or more cats at a time.

Unlocked 22 Jul, 2016 @ 4:39am

I swear, I am NOT Marcellus Wallace

Killed 10 bystanders while wearing the gimp outfit.

Unlocked 17 Feb, 2015 @ 3:00pm

Do you even Enzyte, bro?

Unzipped your pants and got 3 women to laugh at it.

Unlocked 6 Jan, 2015 @ 9:31am

Hutton Gibson Can't Deny This!

Killed over 1,000 people.

Unlocked 19 Feb, 2015 @ 1:43pm

Lieberman is our Leader!

Killed all of the video game protestors at the RWS Office.

Unlocked 16 Feb, 2015 @ 2:41am

Sheriff Arpaio would be proud.

Killed 30 or more people of each skin color.

Unlocked 19 Feb, 2015 @ 10:01am

Can't Touch This

Exploded 30 heads via sledgehammer to the face.

Unlocked 17 Feb, 2015 @ 3:49pm

Fear and Loathing

Smoked over 10 "health" pipes and 10 tins of catnip in one play session.

Unlocked 19 Feb, 2015 @ 3:58pm

GOOD MORNING VIETNAM!

Burned 5 people with the same can of napalm.

Unlocked 17 Feb, 2015 @ 5:19pm

Rick Grimes 4 Life

Made 30 zombies lose their heads.

Unlocked 19 Feb, 2015 @ 4:07pm

It's not cheating, because it's YOUR dog

Played "fetch" with your dog... using a severed human head.

Unlocked 17 Feb, 2015 @ 4:16pm

Where's Mr. McGibblets?

Gave Krotchy the bad touch.

Unlocked 17 Feb, 2015 @ 5:37pm

Finkle IS Einhorn!

Gave a kickoff to a severed head.

Unlocked 4 Jul, 2016 @ 10:15am

Anger Management With Roger Clemens

Nailed a fleeing bystander with a tossed sledgehammer.

Unlocked 17 Feb, 2015 @ 3:20pm

Friend of Dorothy

Successfully hid from the police at max wanted level.

Unlocked 5 Jan, 2015 @ 11:45am

Well, aren't YOU a badass

Kicked open a door.

Unlocked 20 Jul, 2016 @ 9:30am

I don't know whether to kiss you or kill you

Put out someone that's on fire.

Unlocked 6 Jan, 2015 @ 9:22am

It's sterile and I like the taste

Sucked down your own piss.

Unlocked 19 Jul, 2016 @ 12:06pm

Door Mat

Severed all of somebody's limbs without killing them.

Unlocked 17 Feb, 2015 @ 4:40pm

Chuck Norris'd!

Killed someone with a flying jump kick.

Unlocked 7 Jan, 2015 @ 7:18pm

Gotta pay the Troll Toll

Found one of the hidden underground sewers.

Unlocked 16 Feb, 2015 @ 1:17pm

You are not alone

Observed an NPC going POSTAL!

Unlocked 29 Jan, 2015 @ 10:43am

Thanks for the money!

Finished all seven days.

Unlocked 20 Feb, 2015 @ 4:11am

GABAGOOOOOL!

Reunited with an old friend.

Unlocked 21 Jul, 2016 @ 1:05am

Holocaust: Part Deux

Reunited with an old enemy.

Unlocked 21 Jul, 2016 @ 9:02pm

Rain on your Wedding Day

Reunited with an old flame.

Unlocked 3 Aug, 2016 @ 12:38pm

Watchu' Talkin' 'Bout Muhammad

Reunited with a former child star and an infamous terrorist leader.

Unlocked 4 Aug, 2016 @ 2:38pm

Ginger Mint

Killed Zack Ward.

Unlocked 22 Jul, 2016 @ 4:08am

BioShocked

Spent $2000 on vending machines.

Unlocked 5 Aug, 2016 @ 4:28am

RAFIBOMB!!!

Kicked 10 people in the balls.

Unlocked 4 Aug, 2016 @ 2:43pm

Chapelle's Show

Lured a police officer with a piss-soaked donut.

Michonne ain't got nothin' on me

Resurrected a zombie corpse for your own nefarious purposes.

Rebecca Black's Nightmare

Totaled 30 cars.

11 / 30

Hello, Newman

Kicked 30 dogs.

2 / 30

Pussy on a Pedestal

Slaughtered 10 dogs with a kitty-silenced shotgun.

0 / 10

Uncle T-Bag

Escaped from the maximum-security jail cell.

Running With Scissors

Ran 30 miles while holding the scissors.

9 / 30

And THAT'S why you never get out of the tree

Killed all of the book protestors in the library.

Señor Cornballer

Ate 30 donuts while wearing the police officer's uniform.

0 / 30

Anustart!

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with no kills.

40 Year Old Virgin

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with a total play time of 1:30:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)

CAN YOU DIG IT?!

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode using only the Shovel to kill. (Must kill at least 30 people.)

Planet of the Apes: The Musical

Completed the game (any mode) on Hestonworld difficulty.

Scientology Level: OT VIII

Completed the "A Week In Paradise" game mode on POSTAL difficulty.

Fur Sure!

Showed Vince and Mike J. what you thought of them.

Shiva Blast

"Lost" your sledgehammer to a cow.

Don't taze me, bro!

Zapped 20 innocent bystanders with the tazer while wearing the police officer's uniform.

0 / 20

I Am Legend

Committed suicide... the Taliban way.

I should buy a boat

Read the newspaper every day.

Officer McLovin'

Asked a police officer to sign your petition.

Paid the Piper

Successfully bribed your way out of an arrest.

It's OK, we got Greenlit anyway

Killed someone who refused to sign your petition.

FAB-U-LOUS!

Wore all three outfits.

I don't need virgins for this

Suicide-bombed a Taliban member.

A-Rod Who?

Whacked a severed head 50 meters or more with the shovel.

One time, at band camp...

Saved the marching band from explody death.

Better than POSTAL III

Rescued your loyal companion.

My Name is Jesus

Completed Paradise Lost with no kills.

Harder than r/gonewild

Completed Paradise Lost on POSTAL difficulty.

Adderall4All

Completed Paradise Lost with a total play time of 1:45:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)

Rich on Reddit

Sold 30 cats at the Cash 4 Cats vendors.

3 / 30

Gettin DP'd

Made 30 kills while dual-wielding.

5 / 30