Playtime past 2 weeks:
0h

View global achievement stats
You must be logged in to compare these stats to your own
10 of 28 (36%) achievements earned:
Personal Achievements
 

Go Left

Move to the left.
Unlocked 28 Feb, 2019 @ 1:53pm

Go Right

Move to the right.
Unlocked 28 Feb, 2019 @ 1:53pm

Fire Inspector

Safely deploy all the fire extinguishers. For safety.
Unlocked 28 Feb, 2019 @ 2:02pm

Swan Tamer

Make peace with a gaggle of swans. Their natural instinct is to kill.
Unlocked 28 Feb, 2019 @ 2:37pm

Clumsy

Die a lot of times in your nightmares.
Unlocked 28 Feb, 2019 @ 2:52pm

Master Unlocker

Collect enough milk to fill the tank.
Unlocked 13 Mar, 2019 @ 4:48pm

Always Finishes First

Good at video games. Terrible at sex.
Unlocked 13 Mar, 2019 @ 11:44am

Generous Lover

Finish last in a Party Mode game.
Unlocked 4 Mar, 2019 @ 6:41am

Spare Wheel

Be the only one locked out of an ouroborus.
Unlocked 13 Mar, 2019 @ 11:46am

The Perfect Partner

Marry yourself in Abstinence.
Unlocked 22 May, 2019 @ 11:10am



Most Improved Tapulator

Learn how to literally just navigate the main menu.

Early Bird

Swallow every worm.

Sleep No More

Don't let sleeping dongs lie.

Self Defence

Use the cake knife to defend yourself from wedding guests.

Bulking Gear

Use all the "supplements" you can for maximal gains.

Paperwork

Submit your monthly physical report.

Popcorn Buffet

Eat a disgusting amount of popcorn.

Couch Party

Have enough friends and enough controllers to play an 8 player game.

My Precious

Get all of the rings in Lord of the Rings.

Magnetic Basshole

Win Lights Out in under five seconds.

Safety First

Everyone survives having sex in a trash-compactor full of needles.

Till Death Do Us

Have sex in the Date Night graveyard.

Autopaedicatio

Penetrate yourself in Traditional Mode.

Fussy Lover

Save yourself for that special orgy.
+4

4 hidden achievements remaining

Details for each achievement will be revealed once unlocked