JOHN: jeez, why does everyone always die so much?

YES, IT'S TRUE I HATE MANY THINGS, AND WANT THEM DEAD. LIKE ALL NON CHERUBS. WHO AREN'T ME.

YES, I MOSTLY WANT TO SEE EVERY LIVING THING TURN EXTINCT IN BAD WAYS. AND OK, I'VE ALWAYS BEEN A SUCKER FOR MAKING FUNNY MURDERS HAPPEN.

BUT THOSE ARE REALLY JUST HOBBIES! THEY DON'T *DEFINE* ME.

Homestuck [www.mspaintadventures.com]

The people of the Internet had spoken emphatically, and they’d spoken like a five-year-old.