Recenzii recente de Captain Rikus

This game is a steaming pile of cow dung.

And yet people seem to think its breaking new ground and introducing innovative new game modes. The very same game modes that many other INNOVATIVE shooters have introduced and yet if people in the COD fanbase are saying these modes are innovative NOW it means they have lived a very sheltered life.

COD is just a successful ad campaign. Its the Transformers franchise of the gaming world.

"Its not as bad as the last one" is NOT a good review.

"Ghosts, we've been spotted!"
"¿por qué estoy en este jodido juego de mierda ffs"
This or "Ella puta na meda na meddda nananana puta".

When I loaded this game I was dumbstruck by how gorgeous the game looked but it was like looking at a freshly unwrapped state of the art smartphone enabled dog kennel only to discover there was a dog still inside. Dead and half eaten by rats.

Yet again Ubisoft win. They used their mic tricks, their promises and we begged them to release it. But wishing for a zombie virus to be unleashed on humanity so you can live that doomsday scenario with your friends because of how sweet it was inside your mind is probably not a good idea; Thats kinda like this game. You WANT this game so bad but when you have it you wish you had been house invaded by a horde of crack crazed football hooligans hell bent on bumming you to within an inch of your life instead.

This game is absolutely dreadful. A dreary, empty vacume of identical NPC's where you play unlikable "Ghost" USA USA USA heroes who quip "badass" lines about eachothers private lives and banter their way through dreadful narcos scenarios. Dont even get me started on the jokes they crack in the middle of the game as it sounds like that kid in the school canteen who overheard his uncles ♥♥♥♥ jokes at a summer BBQ and thinks he can pull it off.

This game is like that too! It THINKS it can pull it off but all it does is pulls off your ♥♥♥♥ and stuffs it up your ass.

Like a turd that wont flush when i closed the game....it came back on. ♥♥♥♥ you

The Poor Man's Starcraft 2

I was so excited for this game that I hastily preordered it in the deluxe format from my local game store like I had for all the others in the series. I rushed into my local game upon the release date and presented my information in anticipation for receiving my prize. "Whatcha preorder mate?" "Dawn Of War 3" I said with a smile which was followed by an almost inaudible grunt of "Whats Dawn Of War?" from the ♥♥♥♥♥ king from behind the counter, "A badass strategy series with 40k armies and awesome story!" I said full of confidence in my RTS champion. "I loves a bit of 40k, I might have to pick it up!", "You will love Dawn Of War, its got loads of armies to choose from, loads of ideas and great action" I creamed.

Should of kept my mouth shut. I feel like someone who broadcast Rolf Harris was a legend and why he's a great childrens entertainer before realising the ugly truth.

Okay! So I have sunk nearly 30 hours into the game and thats because if I sink £49.99 of my money into a game I will damn well play it but if I think its bad I will warn others of this. Im a believer that when someone says "Dude hates it but played 20 hours lol" those people need to get disappeared. Buy a lawnmower thats rubbish? Well you better still use it unless you can get a refund or you're simply compounding that disaster. Play it and save the rest of us!

The Emperor Protects, ish.

The good points:

+ It looks okay
+ It adds some Last Standesq elite units
+ The Orks are fun to play as
+ Its trying to bring back big armies (That die in droves to afforementioned elites)

The Bad Points:

- Its a depressing Starcraft 2
- It tries so hard to copy whats popular and thinks just by having 40k skins its unique
- The story is pretty bland even from a 40k perspective
- The Eldar have the most boring missions
- Space Marine missions are meh
- Campaign is a mess and just designed to help you choose elites for multiplayer
- Multiplayer selection is something right outta DOTA.
- One multiplayer game mode which is pretty naff
- How many maps??!
- Multiplayer options are down to the bone
- Built for overpriced DLC no doubt
- Loss of many elements of what was good in the previous games

Its kinda like taking the best elements from the old ones and mixing them in a way that the best elements counter eachother and just become meh.

3/10

I can no longer show my face in the presense of the ♥♥♥♥♥ king :*(

Absolutely bloody dreadful game!

Its presentation is flawless but its filled with maggots throughout. A wafer this pinatta filled with squirming maggots and bile!

Pros
+ Looks pretty nice
+ Has some good customizing options
+ Tries to create a skillful new combat system

Cons
- HUUUUUGE loading times between matches thats probably because of the awful menu system.
- Awful AWFUL parry system that relies on a good internet connection more than anything else.
- Stresses versatile fighting but its really rock, paper, scissors
- Balance is almost non existent. If you manage a PERFECT parry then a follow up fast attack will connect, unless you fight against the Assassin class which is what nearly everyone plays as.
- Some classes are just unstoppable, again refering to balance.
- Instant unblockable attacks, which are designed to stop you blocking, even when you aint blocking, which need you to be blocking....so...the system does not work in the SLIGHTEST.
- Assassins Creed characters forced into the game, hence overpopulation of "hooded" imbeciles.
- People throw you off ledges because....movie duels?
- Smaaaaallllll gamemodes
- 2 v 1 combat. Impossible.

The game creators worked hard on a combat system that....kinda....works for 1v1 but guess what? You will fight more than 1 person at the same time frequently and then it becomes a renactment of what ganking was like in MMO's. It is NOT designed for fighting multiple people and it becomes a game of MASSIVE frustration. If you are engaging 2 people in combat then the game (and yes it is a game) should then buff that single person and make it so you CAN fight more than 1 person. Alas this was not to be and sadly its an unresponsive broken mess.

This game is worth 15, NOT the price they want for it now. Get it when its on a bargain bin deal and trust me from the bottom of my heart if you pay full price for this mess you will need councilling.

For goodness sakes do NOT give Ubisoft more money.

Nasty nasty violence! And its beautiful for it.

A game thats all about comebacks from the brink of death. You are a full blown action hero who exists to destroy the evil of the universe!

Rip and tear!....You look like you have big guts!

"Please describe what you liked or disliked about this game and whether you recommend it to others."

Well thats simple enough!

Likes:

+Big ships that shoot big torpedo things
+Big guns that shoot big bullets
+Big campaign that campaigns big
+Big fun (The fun is big)
+Big numbers, like, 40'000 big.

Dislikes:

-Small Multiplayer (2v2....3v3 at least)
-Small mission variation
-Small graphical variations on ships. We need more tell tale upgrades.

Otherwise in all seriousness its a very fun game thats very intense in its execution. High seas navel conflict but in space.

Wonderfully fun game. Its an insulting game filled to the brim with gore, BULLETS, swearing and infantile humour but underneath is also the heart of an intriguing story thats just begging to get expanded upon.

Put the fun back into the FPS? You will not go wrong with this game.

8/10

A wonderfully vibrate game of colour and story telling. 4/5

A small look at what a potential Populous 4 could be like. Good little puzzle game that despite all its perils makes you wish you could actually be there.

A great alternative to L4D. If you can get it on the cheap :)

7/10