Recent reviews by mouse

I cannot recommend it in the current state this is in, how did this pass QA?

A-Life broken or not even present, world feels empty.

Quests bugging and softlocking, Main story softlocking. First artifact softlocking.

Bethesda floating talking heads, performance issues.

You're as beautiful as the day I lost you.
10/10

Rating: ★★☆☆☆

Valheim is an overhyped survival game, that despite its popularity and amazing reviews. Is a perfect example of wasted potential, from the monotonous gameplay to extremely boring and unrewarding progression system.

One of the most glaring issues is the repetitive and mind numbing gameplay. You will be spending HOURS doing mundane tasks such as chopping wood, mining rocks and building, only to find that there is very little pay off for all that work. Trying to pass this grind off as just the type of game it is. It quickly became apparent that this is to artificially extend the playtime because there is nothing to do other than the lackluster boss fights.

It is frustrating that even after owning Valheim since day one, that the developers have not addressed the problems this game suffers from even after multiple updates.

The graphics and sounds are quite well made and the art style is charming, however the environments are uninspired and lack any real variety.

The most disappointing aspect of Valheim is the lack of any meaningful content to do, despite having such a large map, the game fails to deliver any substantial narrative or quests to do. The bosses lack depth and are tedious rather than fun to fight.

In conclusion, Valheim is a tedious, frustrating and unrewarding game that falls short. Repetitive gameplay and shallow content make it an underwhelming experience. Save yourself the time and money and look elsewhere for a more enjoyable game experience.

OH MY ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ GOD! Dude, why is it that when I flash somebody, It's like I just slapped em' in the face with a ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ napkin from a little kid's birthday party, BUT WHEN I GET ♥♥♥♥♥♥ FLASHED, IT'S- IT'S LIKE SOME BIG BROLIC BLACK DUDE NAMED ♥♥♥♥♥♥, REQUIS, PULLS A ♥♥♥♥♥♥ BEDSHEET OVER AND AROUND MY HEAD, AND JUST PROCEEDS TO SKULL ♥♥♥♥ ME?

liar ahead

WATCH. YOUR. TONE. BOY.

CDPR managed to turn this around and make it a fairly solid game, currently trying to 100% it on PS5. However my parents are still disappointed in me

this game is a prison

yes

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