Recent reviews by El Garbanzo

Coming in cold after finishing the original game well over a year ago, the DLC has left me with a sense of awe unmatched by any other titles released in recent times.

However, the DLC is not perfect and is plagued with issues, such as terrible load times, frame rate issues, and bugs.

The hot topic surrounding this DLC right now is that it is "Too hard", which is simply not true. Elden Ring is my first souls experience, and the DLC was my first entry into the hardest of what Fromsoft has to offer. I beat the DLC the night of my writing of this review, and it was no easy feat. Indeed it was difficult, and at times I wondered if it was actually possible for me to beat the final boss.

It was.

Elden Ring is a game that tells you to go explore, experiment, and gain power through what you collect, and the DLC is no different.
Every boss is beatable with what the game gives you. People will try and tell you using summons, co-op, or certain weapons is "Cheap" or "Exploiting", you tell those people to shove it up their ass, because it's simply not true.

Elden Ring is about rising to the challenge, putting the flame of ambition in your heart and becoming Lord. So are you going to sit at your desk and waste valuable time complaining, or will you try again?

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As for the before mentioned problems, Fromsoft likely should have waited an extra month to release the DLC, as there are a few glaring issues in terms of performance and the many bugs that plague some bosses and areas, causing deaths or crashes.

I only hope they release a patch sooner than later, especially for the sake of those with worse-off hardware.

WE WON. WE ARE ON THE RIGHT SIDE OF HISTORY.

"Even if it does violate... The Golden Order."

These are some of the first words you will hear in Elden Ring. It plants a mystery in your mind that persists until the very end. I knew right then that this game was something beyond special.

Elden Ring is a difficult game, especially for new-comers like me, who are new to the Souls-series of games, but that did not stop my endless amazement and sense of wonder every step I took. The environments, the bosses, the silent storytelling of the world around me was so.. unique. The more I played, the more I wanted to know, and I fell deep down the rabbit hole of this game's world.

I will never forget the cinematic landscapes you see for each new area, the distant castle walls or giant golden trees. It is truly something you need to experience.

The gameplay itself is quick and tight, the bosses pose interesting challenges that respect your time. Slaying a boss, especially the ones in the main story, feels like you really did something substantial, as often the world changes around you in their absence.

You are only ever given one goal in Elden Ring that truly matters.

Become the Elden Lord, no matter the cost.

You won't know how deep the rabbit hole goes until all you can do is look up.

Don't research the game, play it. Go in and do it start to finish.

As someone who isn't a fan of card games, this has still easily reached up there as one of my top story driven games.

It blends so many different ideas, philosophies, and themes together to create this product of pure depth.

My only issue is that there is a lack of closure. Perhaps there'll be another game, or update to expand upon it, but at the time of this review all we have is Inscryption.

DIGGY DIGGY HOLE: NOT YOUR GRANDMA'S HOLE EDITION

YOU CAN EXPECT THE FOLLOWING:

-ALIEN BLOOD

-ALIEN ROCK AND STONE

-REALLY ANGRY DWARVES

-Dwarf dress up :)

-SWEAT, TEARS, AND MORE ANGRY DWARVES

BURN YOUR MONEY ALREADY MINER, YOU 'AVE A JOB TO DO MATE.

Play the game yourself before reading any reviews.

No other game's story has genuinely changed my perspective on life before, and I've played, heard, and seen many other stories in my life.

Sure, the pacing of the game might be a tad strange here and there, but this has easily taken the spot as the most memorable game I have ever played, and probably will play, the story is so twisted and heart wrenching, yet I can relate to it very well.

Many might dismiss this game as just another "Game about anxiety and depression" and while sure, it does go over these topics it delivers them in such a way where they are not forced upon you, rather you begin to realize everything yourself. You find everything, nothing comes to you. That is the strongest aspect of this game, and why it delivers it's many messages so well.

Also, the OST for this game is a banger, I recommend checking it out, and I also recommend taking your time by playing this banger of a game.

ULTRAKILL, a game where you play as a robot not driven by blood lust for reasons of evil and murder, but in order to survive, venturing into the depths of hell in order to remain alive.

BLOOD IS FUEL.

While the game is in early access, it offers ultra-addictive gameplay, lore, easter eggs, secrets, and a banger soundtrack. The gameplay is very similar to that of DOOM and QUAKE, but has its own unique spin on both. Being ultra-mobile and never needing to reload allows you to flash around and create a bloody mess at a whim, let us just hope that bloody mess doesn't become you.

I cannot recommend this game enough, worth every penny.

And remember,

HUMANITY IS DEAD.
BLOOD IS FUEL.
HELL IS FULL.

Get Ultrakilling, machine.

You may glance at this game, or see it on the front page of the steam store and think nothing of it. Again and again you pass by it and finally, you visit this page. You look at the reviews and you find this review.

Is it worth it? You ask yourself.
Well ask yourself, do you like a rogue-like that doesn't hold your hand, but doesn't force you to practice like you are in the U.S. Military boot camp? Do you like a variety of play-styles and various ways to completely change how the game is played in the unlikely event you become bored of the base game?

DO YOU LIKE GOOD GAME SOUNDTRACKS?

If you said yes to any of these, this game would probably be a solid choice for you. The balance of this game is near perfect, even as someone who has finished every achievement I still play a considerable amount even though I no longer have a "goal". The game makes you feel like you are progressing every run, even if it ultimately does nothing for you at the end of the run.
It's hard to get bored of this game, and even harder to get bored of the soundtrack.

Oh yeah, and bring a friend, cranks the experience up even more.

After giving the game a good 15 hours on the beta and probably more than 200 on the alpha I must say that I do enjoy the game but it has some strange implementations that hold it back from being a really good game.
For example, the zone locked gear system is strange and unneeded and should be removed. This is because it removes the point of hunting good gear when it will be completely null and void across the river. This also causes a punishment for exploring beyond the zone you obtained the gear in.

The second major issue is that there is literally no defined way of knowing how strong a monster is despite the "tier colors." This is because there are specific abilities enemies have that can do MUCH more damage than what you would normally expect from their tier. (Ex. A green tier enemy managing over 300+ damage in a single hit, despite the player only having 200 to 350 HP during that same tier of gear, almost always resulting in a one-hit K.O).
Not only this, but an enemy even a single tier above you will almost always instant kill you. This is a problem because you can only really gain better gear by killing the next tier up which creates a catch 22.

The third issue is that spawn points are VERY few and far between, so if you die in a dungeon prepare for a 3 to 5 minute walk back to the boss only to die again and again (this cycle repeats until you give up or some how win).

The fourth and final one I will be discussing is the player's attacks. Now normally you might think "how could this be a problem?" Well I will tell you. About +-50% of your attacks will do 0 damage for no specific reason at ALL, which makes it feel very unfair to even attempt group fights of mobs, when you most likely can't do enough DPS to kill them before they kill you.

In conclusion, this game needs a team to reach its full potential, not two people living a pipe dream.

Where do I begin?
This game has so much to do it can hardly ever get old, especially with the frequent expantions.
I call them expantions because they're more than just updates, they're whole new DLC sized updates that you get FOR FREE.
Ever wanted to blow up a whole ship with a single arrow? Yeah, you can do that.
Wanna wanted some snowy plains with giant robotic spiders? Yeah, that's a thing too.
Wanted really damn good graphics and cinimatic quests? Guess what this game has it.

Now no game is perfect..
This game has a bit of a grind to it, and might take a while to get the ball rolling.
BUT DON'T LET THAT TURN YOU OFF FROM THIS GAME!
If you have friends, or play with others, the grind will shorten quite a bit.

Another gripe is that some of the mechanics are complicated at first, but are not too hard to learn, so please if you are reading this and want to give the game a try, don't be afraid to use the ingame global chat! The community is more than willing to help you.

Overall, 9/10, near endless gameplay and fun to be had.