Q: Why didn’t the skeleton dance at the Halloween party?
A: He had no body to dance with!

Q: When does a skeleton laugh?
A: When something tickles his funny bone.

Q: What do you do if you see a skeleton running across a road?
A: Jump out of your skin and join him!

Q: Why did the skeleton run up a tree?
A: Because a dog was after his bones!

Q: What happened to the pirate ship that sank in the sea full of sharks?
A: It came back with a skeleton crew!

Q: How did the skeleton know it was going to rain?
A: He could feel it in his bones!

Q: How did the skeleton know it was raining?
A: He could feel it on his bones!

Q: What do you call a skeleton that does stunts?
A: Bonehead!

Q: Why didn’t the skeleton want to play football, anymore?
A: Because his heart wasn’t in it!

Q: How did skeletons send their letters in the old days?
A: By bony express!

Q: What does a skeleton orders at a restaurant?
A: Spare ribs!!!

Q: Where does the skeleton go to get a new rib!
A: A spare rib restaurant!

Q: When does a skeleton smile?
A: When something bumps into his funny bone!

Q: Why do skeletons hate winter?
A: Beacuse the cold goes right through them!

Q: How do skeletons call their friends?
A: On the telebone!

Q: What do you call a skeleton snake?
A: A rattler!

Q: What did the skeleton say when another skeleton told a lie?
A: You can’t fool me, I can see right through you!

Q: What did the skeleton say while riding his Harley Davidson motorcycle?
A: I’m bone to be wild!

Q: Who was the most famous skeleton detective?
A: Sherlock Bones!

Q: Why did the skeleton go to hospital?
A: To have his ghoul stones removed!

Q: What do boney people use to get into their homes?
A: Skeleton keys!

Q: Why did the skeleton stay out in the snow all night?
A: He was a numbskull!

Q: Why did the skeleton have to goto church to play music?
A: They don’t have any organs!

Q: What do you call a skeleton who won’t get up in the mornings?
A: Lazy bones!

Q: What do you call a skeleton that is always telling lies?
A: A boney phoney!

Q: Why wasn’t the naughty skeleton afraid of the police?
A: Because he knew they couldn’t pin anything on him!

Q: What happened to the lazy skeleton?
A: He was bone idle!

Q: What did the skeleton say to his girlfriend?
A: I love every bone in your body!

Q: What do you call a skeleton who presses the door bell?
A: A dead ringer!

Q: What is a skeleton?
A: Somebody on a diet who forgot to say “when”!

Q: Why do skeletons like to drink milk?
A: Because milk is so good for the bones!

Q: How does a skeleton clean himself?
A: By taking a milk bath!

Q: What sort of soup do skeletons like?
A: One with plenty of body in it!

Q: Why are skeletons so calm?
A: Because nothing gets under their skin!

Q: What happened to the skeleton that was attacked by a werewolf?
A: He ran off with some bones and didn’t leave him with a leg to stand on!

Q: What did the thousand year old skeleton complain of?
A: Aching bones!

Q: Why did the skeleton go to the party?
A: To pick up somebody!

Q: What’s a skeleton’s favourite musical instrument?
A: A trom-bone!

Q: What type of art do skeletons like?
A: Skulltures!

Q: Why didn’t the skeleton eat the cafeteria food?
A: Because he didn’t have the stomach for it!

Q: Why couldn’t the skeleton just die?
A: He didn’t have the guts!

Q: What happened when the skeletons rode pogo sticks?
A: They had a rattling good time!

Q: Why did the skeleton pupil stay late at school?
A: He was boning up for his exams!

Q: What happened to the skeleton who went to a party?
A: All the others used him as a coat rack!

Q: What happened to the skeleton who went to medical school?
A: The other students started to name tag the name of each bone!

Q: What do you give a skeleton for valentine’s day?
A: Bone-bones in a heart shaped box!

Q: Why didn’t the skeleton go to see a scary movie?
A: He didn’t have the guts!

Q: Why did the skeleton go disco dancing?
A: To see the boogy man!

Q: What did the skeleton say to the vampire?
A: You suck!

Q: Why did the skeleton cross the road?
A: To go to the body shop!

Q: What do skeletons say before they begin dining?
A: Bone appetite!

Q: What happened to the skeleton who stayed by the fire too long?
A: He became bone dry!

Q: Why do skeletons hate winter?
A: Because the wind just goes straight through them!

Q: What kind of plate does a skeleton eat off?
A: Bone china!

Q: What instrument do skeletons play?
A: Trom-BONE!

Q: Who was the most famous French skeleton?
A: Napoleon bone-apart!!

Q: How do skeletons get their mail?
A: By bony express!

Q: What is a skeleton favorite Star Trek character?
A: Bones!!

Q: Why was the skeleton a fast drinker?
A: He always had to skull!