READ BEFORE ADDING
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Due to the massive amount of scammers I've been getting lately, I will NOT accept ANY friend requests unless you comment first. If you don't comment first, you WILL be blocked as you will be assumed to be a scammer as well.

Also, as of current I am NOT selling my backpack.

Trading Info
--------------------------
I'm a weird collector, got an item that's just kind of odd (ex: tradable pyrovision goggles, alien swarm parasites, headless horseless headman's headtakers, etc)? Well I might just have interest in buying it, don't be shy with trying to negotiate an offer with me! I'm also always looking for spelled items (especially paint spells)!

Looking to buy bulk mackerels: Will pay 1 scrap per mackerel (rounded up to nearest scrap), with prices increasing the more you offer (+0.5 Scrap per for every 50, up to 9 scrap per)!
(1-50 Mackerels = 0.75 Scrap per, 51-100 = 1 Scrap per, etc.)


Group Invite Policy
--------------------------
Invite me to a group, I'll join no matter what it is
Unless it's a raffle group
"Well maybe you should just take a look."
No, I don't want to join the raffle group.
"Well how about I just send you invites to 50 different raffle groups and you can just decide for each one yourself."
I DON'T WANT TO JOIN YOUR FLOCCINAUCINIHILIPILIFICATIVELY RAFFLE GROUP

Game Info
---------------
I use to play SCP: Containment Breach almost religiously
I use to play Minecraft however mostly modded
Favorite Game: Half-Life

Miscellaneous Info
--------------------------
Age: Axolotl
Address: ToonKriticY2K's Skype Messages
Sexuality: Gamer
Sex: ist
Favorite Show: Red Vs Blue
Favorite Anime: Violet Evergarden, Angel Beats, Land of the Lustrous, Overlord
Favorite Movies: Vampire Hunter D: Bloodlust, Watchmen, Constantine: City of Demons, Horns, Deathgasm
Favorite Bands: Keygen Church, The Exiled Martyr, Aurelio Voltaire, Creature Feature, GHOST
Favorite Season: Winter
Favorite Holiday: Halloween
Religion: RickyToast

Unique Things
----------------------------------
I own a 1 of 1 Unusual Sheriff's Stetson
I own over 7000 Holy Mackerels
I own 5 Horseless Headless Horsemann's Headtakers
I own 18 Alien Swarm Parasites
I own 2 Pyrovision Goggles
I have ~40 Worlds and ~300 Avatars uploaded on VRChat
I maintain a Consistent 80% Loss Rate on 50/50 Odds

Goals
---------
Get 60,000 Holy Mackerels
Acquire Every Tradable Alien Swarm Parasite
Get a Blank Pro-KS Kit
Get a Strange KS HHHH

Accomplishments
--------------------------
1. Ate an Entire Chocolate Cake in 1/2 an hour, while playing Roblox at 12:30 am
2. Ended up buying Deep Space Waifu: Flat Justice and Unintentionally made it my 100th game owned
3. Got stuck in a 30 minute round of Twister on VRChat in full-body with a pole dancer until the host forcibly declared it a tie so that we'd stop.
4. Own the Largest Collection of Holy Mackerels in the World to my knowledge

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^they turned it to hearts, damn the bastards!

“Your thirty legs enable you to type very quickly, x7J-nqP3nhn2, but your skill in subterfuge is wanting. It is very obvious that you yourself are a house centipede, and that you are lobbying on behalf of your species.”

The USSR Enterprise: GOOD NIGHT
💕Duck💕: Oof
The USSR Enterprise: SLEEP TIGHT
The USSR Enterprise: HAVE GOOD DREAMS
The USSR Enterprise: I LOVE YOU?
The USSR Enterprise: ♥♥♥♥♥♥
💕Duck💕: I have a high regard for you

“Noble turkey stance! Fist of the eleventeen thousand war cushions! It are the cackening! Damn the tornados, siss boom cack!”

The Ali-eye: I can spell Vegan with three o's
Smiles: mooo
The Ali-eye: darn didn't think of that
Smiles: than wut was it
The Ali-eye: vegetable
Smiles: huh
Smiles: Three O's?
The Ali-eye: yes
The Ali-eye: gotcha good
Smiles: i don't get it
The Ali-eye: exactly
Smiles: huh
Smiles: this is so confusing
FLICK: vegtible get it
Smiles: alexa play despacito
The Ali-eye: its like matter
The Ali-eye: you have matter and anti matter
The Ali-eye: your the matter
The Ali-eye: im the onti mottor
The Ali-eye: with three o's

FortniteGamer.FNG: wait
FortniteGamer.FNG: how the hell does a noodle get rusty?
A True Irishman: you leave it in the rain
Mr. Salt: what

Demented Garden Hose: d0n skadaddle lemon skidoodle the hose waters thy fate, now with my luscious words i command thee,
Demented Garden Hose: “BeGoNe FiGNooTiN!”

Dmpca: oooh heli out
Demented Garden Hose: excuse me kind sir of the Doom Moon Pan Clan (of) Alpacas
Demented Garden Hose: what is the of the be of the sacred text in order to enter one’s accommodations

Dmpca: who is this person
Dmpca: are you the one who was reading a story outside my base yesterday?
[OffDuty] Discobits: ??
Demented Garden Hose: I! Am the of the indeed yes yes Hose of who as indeed been granted the dementia of the great Garden
Dmpca: my ♥♥♥♥, this guy, came and went into a one by one, and just read the weirdest story
Dmpca: for like an hour
Demented Garden Hose: The great Garden who has brought us years of hope and prosperity, only, to leave us with this new
BlackDrake: i can respect that kind of dedication
Dmpca: i mean i had to listen
Dmpca: it put alot of time into it
Demented Garden Hose: , blessed island. We shall claim this land, and build a great shrine of their vegetative and fruity
Demented Garden Hose: and flowery glory

“The shier size of this man does make me believe, that he has the power to rape a horse.”

“Ha, at least I have the moral high ground, I ♥♥♥♥ children!”

“Yes I am a heavy main, and no we dont exist.
I am in fact, 3 scouts in a trenchcoat.”

Demented Garden Hose : thats not special
Demented Garden Hose : thats normal
*DEAD* Refractive : I need an adult
Demented Garden Hose : ♥♥♥♥♥♥ fagwagon

Demented Garden Hose : shut of mirror toucher

Demented Garden Hose : bite off lead head

"Good judgement comes from experience. And Experience comes from poor judgement."

I may have Parkinson's on literally every canvas, but damn it i want to write e̶r̶o̶t̶i̶c̶a̶ ̶a̶b̶o̶u̶t̶ ̶h̶o̶r̶s̶e̶s̶ thrilling adventures!

Lord Chrono: I literally don't know anybody who has been rejected as much as Deconda.

Morning_star: Do your taxes
AnIrishmanWithACalculator: Not with you around

AnIrishmanWithACalculator: When a Simp Supreme is going to pass on his title, it is customary to fill the receiver's house with thousands of pounds of macaroni

[9:50 PM]
Demented Garden Hose:
Khorne: Supreme School Shooter who also draws Death Metal cover-art
Tzeentch: "Hee Hee Hoo Hoo I'm a ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ garden gnome with a boner for playing Risk"
Nurgle: A ♥♥♥♥♥♥
Slaanesh: A mix of a VRChat private room, everybody's search history, and founder of e621
[9:52 PM]
Óðinn: I find this strangely...an accurate description.

AnIrishmanWithACalculatorToday at 4:33 PM
Bog nahpin [brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrt] hehg the ***__~~n~~__***||*y*||__o**~~o~~**__*m*

AnIrishmanWithACalculatorToday at 10:51 AM
Relinquish yourself into me, for I require the essence of the Earth-chanVR

AnIrishmanWithACalculator05/04/2020
*Grows new windpipe and ejects the last one out my mouth like a pez dispenser*
Heh, bet you thought I could choke huh?

AnIrishmanWithACalculator: really wrinkling my aluminum, y'know?

Hollifer: My mom is hot

Quiet Dude: I want feet...

Nuclear Flow: Age is just a number

Zwisty: I'm a little sussy baka

Quiet Dude: ♥♥♥♥ your pants
Quiet Dude: Kill you Sister
Quiet Dude: Play Games

Quiet Dude: Wake up America, there are scarier things out there; like me.

Quiet Dude: Oh we're still talking about child porn? Yea that'd be pretty nice.

"Nothing compares to the crunch of sand"

It's not emotional manipulation it's roleplay

"I like him cause he reminds me of my abusive boyfriend"

"All over that like 600 spiders in an outhouse"

Your "vibe" is a Denny's lasagna

"Limited means everything not everywhere"

Hollifer: i remember the first time i touched a horseshoe crab

Do a rat dance

"Navigate to the flow chart in the sky"

"The enemy of my enemy is me"

"WE are the sons of the crabs who ate Amelia Earhart"

"Play with your bones"

"Id kill my self but the chances of spawning back as an Indian are way too high"

"The chicks on grindr are way hotter anyway"

"I'll drop your credit score so low you won't be able to get a loan at the library!"

"...it was like NiN midi played using the HL 1 crowbar sound effect"

"Do not subtract from the population do not add to the population"

"Cringe is dead and I'm still breathing"

"And when we kissed I felt like my chihuahua was getting minced by a weed wacker"

"Sir there's been a second elasmosaurus."

"You know I'm real sensitive Tiffany...like a dandelion"

"I've got a face for radio and a voice for print"

"Big as my head and hard as my ♥♥♥♥. What am I? A HUGE ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ ROCK!"