Recent reviews by Jaymuh Guhmuh

I honestly don't understand all of the cautionary language – including from the developers – that this game is not actually happy. I found it refreshingly so! It reminds one of childhood (before the voices), when one could spend the day playing with one's toys. Oh, the wonderful splotchy patterns their limbs would make on the white floors and walls! Kind of like the ones that the men in white coats would tell you to look at (“What does this one look like? And what about this one?”). Except in red splotches instead of black ones. And the soundtrack! I swear, it's like they were there, in my head, when I heard my own music playing, over and over and over and over and over and over and over. And over and over and over and over.

Yes, this game is a happy game. Very happy.

If, like me, you are sick of the infestation of the games industry - from the journalism to the games themselves - by the woke virus, get this game. It isn't just woke-free, it is utterly, gloriously, hilariously anti-woke.

It's not about the money. It's about...sending a message.

Doesn't like ultra-widescreen monitors: it zooms in so you can't see the entire UI. If you set the resolution to a lower value, it ignores it. To add insult to injury, you can't change the resolution in-game. You have to exit to the main menu. When you do *that*, you lose your progress because there's no save option.

Horrible.

Holy $#!^.

The developers of Hardspace: Shipbreaker are apparently unaware (or unconcerned) that they live in a world with really wide monitors. Upon launch, those of us (aberrations, mutants, marginalizees) afflicted by a screen ratio greater than 16:9 are deemed unworthy of viewing the entire image: "Only a fraction for you people!" And if you, like me, decide at this point to immediately exit the game - well, get ready to click. And click. And click. You see, Rule #1 of Shipbreaker is, apparently, no one gets to leave Shipbreaker. Spam the Escape key? The game laughs at you! Try one of the F keys, hoping that main menu access is modeled after 90's Blizzard games? Futility! "You *will* answer our game-opening questions, Freak! We do not acknowledge the otherwise-universal GTFO [Esc] key!" It's like being trapped in one of those roped-off queues where the only direction is forward; there is no way out even if you've decided you don't want to go in because this establishment is clearly unwelcoming to 'your kind'.

In an industry obsessed with signalling the virtue of 'inclusiveness', this game has made it clear that some gamers just don't belong in their (Hard) space.

You cannot rebind your controls. YOU CANNOT REBIND YOUR CONTROLS.

You are not allowed to remap your movement keys. Do you need to know anything else?

Controls are awful, making the game unplayable.

Democracy Status: Intact

Risk of rain: > 0%
Risk of fun: > 98%

There's some fun to be had here, so clearly at least a portion of the development team knew what they were doing. But there's a lot of frustration which ultimately soured the fun for me.