YOU. ME. GAS STATION. What are we getting for dinner? Sushi of course. Uh oh, there was a roofie inside of our gas station sushi, we black out and wake up in a sewer. We're surrounded by fish; horny fish. You know what that means. Fish orgy, the stench draws in a bear. What are we gonna do? We're gonna fight it. BEAR FIGHT. BEAR HANDED. BEAR naked? oh yes, please. We befriend the bear after we beat it in a brawl. then we ride into a chuck-e-cheese, dance dance revolution. REVOLUTION? OVERTHROW THE GOVERNMENT? uh, I think so. next thing you know, i'm reincarnated as Jesus Christ. Then i turn into a jet, fly into the sun, black out again, wake up, do a bump, white out which i didn't know you could do, then i smoked a joint. Greened-out, then i turned into the sun. uh oh, looks like the meth is kicking in!


Ughhughhhguhahehehehehheeehehhheeeheee!!!

⠀⠀⠀⠀▀█ █▀█ ▄█ █▀█
⠀⠀⠀⠀█▄ █▄█ ░█ █▄█
☆.¸¸.•´☆.¸¸.•´☆.¸¸.•´☆.¸¸.•´☆.¸¸.•´☆.¸¸.•´

⋱★⋰⋱★⋰⋱★⋰⋱★⋰⋱★⋰⋱★⋰⋱★⋰⋱★⋰⋱★⋰⋱★
░░░░░░█░█ █▀█ █▀█ █▀█ █░█░░░░░
░░░░░░█▀█ █▀█ █▀▀ █▀▀ ▀█▀░░░░░
░░░░░░▀░▀ ▀░▀ ▀░░ ▀░ ░▀░░░░░░
█▄░█ █▀▀ █░█░█░░█░█ █▀▀ █▀█ █▀█
█░██ █▀▀ █░█░█░░▀█▀ █▀▀ █▀█ ██▀
▀░░▀ ▀▀▀ ░▀▀▀░░░░▀░ ▀▀▀ ▀░▀ ▀░▀

I used to play Fortnite all night. No sleep! But ever since Obama told me to try Raid Shadow Legends for free, I am addicted. This game is a game. It has graphics. It has characters. Best of all it has a loot box mechanic to enhance my experience even more by adding another exciting chance based layer to the game! Two week ago I spend all my money becoming a Raid Shadow Legend. Now I live in a dumpster outside a McDonald’s with free WiFi. At night I sneak into the McDonald’s like my new raccoon dad, Stripey, taught me to do so I can charge my phone. Through the cracked screen I am still perpetually amazed by the graphics of this game... they look so real! Thank you Obama, you truly changed my life