Dave. 最近的评测

I don't even remember playing this game. If you were to tell me I played this game I would call you a lying ♥♥♥♥♥♥, because you are. I've never SEEN or touched this game.

I'm a lot like Harry. I was in a car crash 4 years ago and forgot everything. After many years trying to piece my life back together I can say it was NOT worth it. Now I have 2 stupid kids and a wife that says "You're not the man I married." At least in the game you don't have to deal with child support.

I like running over hundreds of zombies in cheap sedans. Sometimes I pretend it's my neighbour that I steal from. I primarily steal from his lawn, not because I want his lawn furniture or his lawn ornaments but because I want him to have NOTHING.

This game makes my crazy schizophrenic thoughts look incoherent. This game makes L.A. Noire look like a puzzle game for toddlers. This game makes me want to go outside and look at real crime scenes to backseat detectives.

Skaven have infiltrated New York, the end is near.

This game made me join the Army. I love it here in the Army. Hey, tripwire don't forget to collect your check from the recruiters' office.

My great-grandfather was in the Great War, I wish he was alive to play this game. He would've loved it. I actually have some of his old letters he wrote when he was in the trenches. I'll put in a little excerpt "Ich hole diesen mutterlosen Camping-Narren."

Bent double, like old beggars under sacks,
Knock-kneed, coughing like hags, we cursed through sludge,
Till on the haunting flares we turned our backs,
And towards our distant rest began to trudge.
Men marched asleep. Many had lost their boots,
But limped on, blood-shod. All went lame; all blind;
Drunk with fatigue; deaf even to the hoots
Of gas-shells dropping softly behind.

Gas! GAS! Quick, boys!—An ecstasy of fumbling
Fitting the clumsy helmets just in time,
But someone still was yelling out and stumbling
And flound’ring like a man in fire or lime.—
Dim through the misty panes and thick green light,
As under a green sea, I saw him drowning.

In all my dreams before my helpless sight,
He plunges at me, guttering, choking, drowning.

If in some smothering dreams, you too could pace
Behind the wagon that we flung him in,
And watch the white eyes writhing in his face,
His hanging face, like a devil’s sick of sin;
If you could hear, at every jolt, the blood
Come gargling from the froth-corrupted lungs,
Obscene as cancer, bitter as the cud
Of vile, incurable sores on innocent tongues,—
My friend, you would not tell with such high zest
To children ardent for some desperate glory,
The old Lie: Dulce et decorum est
Pro patria mori.

This is a Utopian version of L.A. I'm able to steal cars and be an overall menace driving my loud muscle car at night. I wish I could do these things in real life. Wait, that sounds a lot like regular L.A. Thank you GTA V.

Warsim is like Warno in real life.