37 people found this review helpful
1 person found this review funny
Recommended
0.0 hrs last two weeks / 637.4 hrs on record (535.8 hrs at review time)
Posted: 21 May, 2015 @ 10:30pm
Updated: 14 Jun @ 10:07am

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F5KlOIakXCo

It's strange the things people remember. You take me, for example.

One day, back in the summer of 2015, I met a girl. We weren't together long; on-and-off towards the end. Six months in all, maybe - little more than a side-quest in what I hope is a lengthy campaign. That was 9 years ago, and in the time since I've travelled to some wild and wonderful corners of the earth. I've carved a career for myself. I've met amazing human beings, and some vile ones to balance. I've laughed until I cried, and cried until I laughed. I've found love, and it's found me.

But I'll bet a week hasn't gone by in those 9 years that I haven't thought about that girl.

She had been courting me online for months leading up to that fateful summer. Her seductress powers were formidable: the saucy E3 demo, that voluptuous Big Alpha, those sensual early reviews - this minx knew how to make a man sweat. So we arranged to meet up, and when I finally laid eyes on her, it was love at first orbital barrage. Though she wasn't quite what I, and many, had expected. Certain issues left people cold; held them at bay. She would become an outcast with time, a bastard child, and I didn't defend her as much as I should have. I regret that now. She didn't let many get close enough to truly see and love her for the diamond in the rough she was. It wasn't her fault, really. It's just how she was built. So I can't deny she had her flaws and foibles, but don't we all? And I loved her despite all of them. Maybe even in spite of them, in the end.

Those first few months were bliss. Some of the most fun I've ever had with a girl. We spent countless hours together. We came to know and understand each other so deeply. She even introduced me to a whole network of friends I never would have found otherwise. Staying up all night to watch the sunrise together while berating trappers with the spatial awareness of a wet f#cking sponge became our favourite pastime. We forged memories that you people wouldn't believe... power relays on fire, just a few small bars from total destruction... we watched Markov's lightning gun glitter in the dark near the Armory gates, and Griffin's harpoon wrestle a stage 3 wraith into the swamps of Medlab... all those moments will fade to time, like tears in rain.

There came a point before long when this beautiful creature fell gravely ill. I knew the condition was serious, but I always hoped she would pull through. Most people deserted her, and I understood why. I resented it, but I understood. Nevertheless, I stuck by her side, even when she finally fell into an inevitable coma. It was crushing to witness something once so full of life be stripped of it so completely. And in the end, I too had to walk away. You can call me callous, and I may agree, but I simply couldn't watch her slip into nothingness anymore. I gave her one final kiss, and closed down the browser for the last time. She remained on life-support for a number of years after I left. At some point, someone finally had the mercy to pull the plug.

What killed her in the end is still a topic of debate. Some popular opinions point towards a fundamentally misconceived concept in conjunction with outrageous monetization. Others blame mechanics and inadequate balancing. While some lay fault squarely at the feet of an aggressive, autistically fickle playerbase. But none of it matters now. She suffers no more, and all we have left are the memories. She has slipped the surly bonds of earth, and now dances the skies on laughter-silvered wings.

I suppose I'm grasping for closure by writing all this. Her scent is hard to shake. As Jimmy Gator once uttered in his darkest hours, "The book says we may be through with the past, but the past ain't through with us"... it's time to move forward and leave this sweet girl to rest. She wasn't perfect, and she was cruelly reminded of that every day, but she didn't need to be. She was one of the most unique people I ever met. She was my angel - but some angels simply aren't long for this world.

5/5
Was this review helpful? Yes No Funny Award
13 Comments
Aen ツ 6 Jun @ 6:22pm 
Well said!!
๖ۣۜAngry ๖ۣۜDiodon 6 Jun @ 2:56am 
Nice review !
Paulin Bacana 4 Jun @ 11:46am 
:heart_of_succubus:
:hana1::hana2: 10/10 :sob: :sob:
kevs 1 Jun @ 11:56pm 
lmao frfr
heroin henry 1 Jun @ 10:55am 
:steamthumbsup:
Aisaki_12 31 May @ 9:12pm 
Interesting, I really like your review :CheerfulBonnibel::Speech_Love:
Briam* 31 May @ 6:12pm 
:BBEAR:
Nectar🌻 31 May @ 6:10pm 
:lunar2019piginablanket: