THE CHINESE ARE MILKING ME OF SEMEN WITH A STRAW THAT HAS ROOM TO WIGGLE AROUND WITHOUT MY ♥♥♥♥ TOUCHING THE PLASTIC
PLEASE GET THIS MESSAGE TO DR. JORDAN B. PETERSON AND TOGETHER WITH HIS FELLOW INTELLECTUALS OF THE DARK WEB THEY CAN FORM A PLAN TO RESCUE ME FROM MY CURRENT UNFORTUNATE AND EMBARRASSING PREDICAMENT BECAUSE EVERYONE HERE IS USING A NORMAL SEMEN MILKING HOSE AND WHENEVER THEY HAVE TO MAKE SURE IT RETAINS SUCTION SO THAT THE ♥♥♥ MAY FLOW THE NURSES GIGGLE AND SPEAK THEIR WEIRD LANGUAGE AND POINT AT MY HOG ONE EVEN LOOKED AT ME AND IN BROKEN ENGLISH SAID "AHH SO CUUUUTE" LIKE MY DONG WAS A BABY ANIMAL OR THE BLUE CATS FROM AVATAR THAT WERE MEANT TO REPRESENT NATIVE AMERICANS BUT I WOULD ♥♥♥♥ THE MAIN BLUE CAT IF YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN BY THAT I DON'T CARE IF I HAVE TO GO SLOPPY SECONDS WITH BLUE CAT JAKE SULLY I JUST WANT TO ♥♥♥♥ THE BLUE CAT AND NOT BE STUCK IN THIS GODFORSAKEN SEMEN MILKING MACHINE

𝙰𝚝𝚝𝚎𝚗𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗 𝚊𝚕𝚕 𝚟𝚒𝚜𝚒𝚝𝚘𝚛𝚜 𝚘𝚏 𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚜 𝚙𝚛𝚘𝚏𝚒𝚕𝚎: 𝚃𝚑𝚒𝚜 𝚖𝚊𝚗 𝚒𝚜 𝚂𝙴𝚅𝙴𝚁𝙴𝙻𝚈 𝚊𝚞𝚝𝚒𝚜𝚝𝚒𝚌. 𝙳𝚘 𝚗𝚘𝚝 𝚖𝚊𝚔𝚎 𝚕𝚘𝚞𝚍 𝚗𝚘𝚒𝚜𝚎𝚜 𝚗𝚎𝚊𝚛 𝚑𝚒𝚖. 𝙳𝚘 𝚗𝚘𝚝 𝚜𝚑𝚒𝚗𝚎 𝚋𝚛𝚒𝚐𝚑𝚝 𝚕𝚒𝚐𝚑𝚝𝚜 𝚗𝚎𝚊𝚛 𝚑𝚒𝚖. 𝙳𝚘 𝚗𝚘𝚝 𝚕𝚘𝚘𝚔 𝚑𝚒𝚖 𝚍𝚒𝚛𝚎𝚌𝚝𝚕𝚢 𝚒𝚗 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚎𝚢𝚎. 𝙳𝚘𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚊𝚗𝚢 𝚘𝚏 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚊𝚋𝚘𝚟𝚎 𝚖𝚊𝚢 𝚜𝚎𝚝 𝚑𝚒𝚖 𝚘𝚏𝚏 𝚘𝚗 𝚊𝚗 𝚊𝚞𝚝𝚒𝚜𝚝𝚒𝚌 𝚛𝚊𝚖𝚙𝚊𝚐𝚎 𝚝𝚑𝚊𝚝 𝚌𝚘𝚞𝚕𝚍 𝚎𝚗𝚍𝚊𝚗𝚐𝚎𝚛 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚕𝚒𝚟𝚎𝚜 𝚘𝚏 𝚖𝚊𝚗𝚢

Friends don't look at friends that way

──────▄▌▐▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀​▀▀▀▀▀▀▌
───▄▄██▌█ BEEP BEEP
▄▄▄▌▐██▌█ GAY PORN DELIVERY
███████▌█▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄​▄▄▄▄▄▄▌
▀(@)▀▀▀▀▀▀▀(@)(@)▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀​▀▀▀▀(@)▀

Holy ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ ♥♥♥♥. I want to bang the animal crossing dog so ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ bad. I can't stand it anymore. Every time I go to the town hall I get a massive erection. I've seen literally every rule 34 post there is of her online. My dreams are nothing but constant ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ sex with Isabelle. I'm sick of waking up every morning with six nuts in my boxers and knowing that those are nuts that should've been busted inside of Isabelle's tight dog ♥♥♥♥♥. I want her to have my mutant human/dog babies.

♥♥♥♥, my ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ mom caught me with the neighbors dog. I'd dressed her in my sister's skirt and went to ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ town. She hasn't said a word to me in 10 hours and I'm worried she's gonna take away my 3DS. I might not ever get to see Isabelle again.