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It sounds like the issue might be related to the region mismatch caused by your VPN.
Also make sure your steam store region is the same as the other people in your family sharing account and they also have to be in the same household to use with the new version they use now.
1. Reauthorize Family Sharing
2. Log out of steam and log back in
Sometimes that can fix problems. Sometimes...
3. Contact the steam support
Tell the steam support about your problem. It can take some time until they answer but I would say that they can (sometimes) help you the best when it comes to steam problems.
I would also be careful when it comes to VPNs on Steam. Some actions can get you banned. For example bypassing regional restrictions.
I did log out and log back in, ive rebooted mac, and it says family sharing is on, so i am at a loss to understand why its doing this.
Then I would report the problem to the steam support.
VPN software has the potential of preventing the Steam client application from accessing the Steam network. If a game requires network capability, it may also interfere with that connection.
You'll want to ensure that your network is configured to allow the traffic of Steam and the games you are playing.
source: https://gtm.you1.cn/helpsteam/en/faqs/view/1F39-DCB4-FF28-5748
sounds like yer right.. if you change region on some software it tries to think you need to bu it again for that region. console's had that problem because of the security features.. thinking some guy in ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ idaho is trying to login to your account